Master has invited me to stop by his work for lunch, so this will just be a quick note before I'm out of here.
Sometimes the fact that I am all about pleasing him has a settling and relaxing effect on me. Last night was all about his pleasure. A massage, foot rub, cock sucking and then a quick fuck while he hit me with a cane (reverse cowgirl, if you must imagine how that works- NOT my favorite position). I had contradictory feelings flying around. First was that I should be enjoying this more than I was. But I wasn't. I was enjoying pleasing him, but for my own sexual feelings, honestly, not that much going on down there until right at the end when I started feeling all "Oooh, more, more". But then it was bedtime. I relaxed into the covers feeling contented that I had satisfied him, that I was a good slave.
Sometimes that is the best thing for my attitude, when he calls me his little cocksucking hole, his bit of tissue to be used for his orgasm.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
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Im not sure if this will make sense, but bear with me lol
ReplyDeleteIn the times that it is just about his pleasure, its then when i enjoy it the most, but not necessarily at the time, but more afterwards, i need to feel that i have given him what he needs, and that his needs are more important than mine.
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I admit that I have come late to this sort of pleasure. This is new for me, maybe the last 6 months or so. Before that I would have mostly been feeling only a heavy dose of frustration, while trying to talk myself down, so I'm happy with this. It feels like progress. I still have no illusions that there won't be backsliding, but for now I'm good.
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