Yesterday morning I was sitting with my coffee when Master came in and pulled me on to the floor. He unzipped his fly and pushed my head down on himself. In a few minutes he told me to stand up and bend over the counter. He took me, just a few quick thrusts, then ordered me to clean him with my mouth. Master used my hair to dry himself, treating me like a rag (so hot, this!).
I went and opened the gate for him, all wet, squishy and full of frustrated desire.
It was a long day, keeping busy, waiting for Master to get home.
Last night we made sweet, sweet love tenderly in each others arms.
Ok, who am I kidding?
He wrapped a belt around my neck (after I said it was currently my fondest wish) and beat me with the end of it while fucking me.
It was so. fucking. hot.
Friday, July 8, 2016
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
How To Beat a Bad Mood
Tuesday morning I woke up in a bad mood. I have no idea why, it was just one of those days. I did my best to put on a pleasant face and make Master's breakfast the way I always do. However, after it was done and I had put away dishes I came back into the kitchen to find him cleaning the stove. Ok...
I guess I didn't clean the stove after cooking on it. I just stood there staring at him until he asked what was wrong with me. Just a bad mood, no reason. He told me he still wanted to use me, so he took me upstairs and had me suck him as I lay on my side, then he fucked me. Bad mood still intact, I appreciated being used for his pleasure hole even though I was barely excited. It's an objectification thing for me. He finished, and told me to roll over.
After the first few swats of the cane I wanted to cry. In a bad mood and now in pain as well! Feeling sorry for myself.
But as the beating went on my masochism won out over the bad mood. I started to get turned on and felt less pain, more arousal. When I reached a state of need he gave me the vibrator and left the room. I tried to come, but couldn't, until he came back and gave me the command. He flogged me at the same time, and made me come hard and painfully.
The bad mood was totally gone, and didn't come back even a little bit. We had to get up and do errands then, and I was soooo sleepy.
I guess I didn't clean the stove after cooking on it. I just stood there staring at him until he asked what was wrong with me. Just a bad mood, no reason. He told me he still wanted to use me, so he took me upstairs and had me suck him as I lay on my side, then he fucked me. Bad mood still intact, I appreciated being used for his pleasure hole even though I was barely excited. It's an objectification thing for me. He finished, and told me to roll over.
After the first few swats of the cane I wanted to cry. In a bad mood and now in pain as well! Feeling sorry for myself.
But as the beating went on my masochism won out over the bad mood. I started to get turned on and felt less pain, more arousal. When I reached a state of need he gave me the vibrator and left the room. I tried to come, but couldn't, until he came back and gave me the command. He flogged me at the same time, and made me come hard and painfully.
The bad mood was totally gone, and didn't come back even a little bit. We had to get up and do errands then, and I was soooo sleepy.
Tuesday, July 5, 2016
Changes in Feelings about Kneeling
A request by "N. Likes" from the kneeling post:
I'd be really interested to hear more of your thoughts about the process by which the taboo and humiliation dissolved - both your initial experience of them, and how you feel about them now.
I remember very few specific instances, but right in the beginning of starting a D/s dynamic with my Master, there were times when he would tell me to kneel and it brought out a lot of emotions for me.
I felt it deeply. It wasn't something that came easily or naturally. I was not one of those people who had dreamed of the day I could kneel at a Master's feet. Not at all. I obeyed him: I can't remember ever refusing, but it felt awkward, a bit taboo, and fairly humiliating. All that together combined in my mind to make it arousing as heck.
It didn't take long, probably less than 10-20 times, before it felt natural to me, kneeling at his feet any time.
There was even one time when we were at a munch and I said something a bit out of line, I don't remember what, and he ordered me to kneel and kiss his feet. It wasn't a punishment, really, more of a reminder of my place. I did it without thinking, instantly, but then afterward I was self conscious about what other people around may have thought. Not that it makes any difference. But I wondered.
Now, I can't think of any place that gives more comfort and relaxation that being ordered to kneel at his feet. It is a spot of security, almost one of pride. My place.
I'd be really interested to hear more of your thoughts about the process by which the taboo and humiliation dissolved - both your initial experience of them, and how you feel about them now.
I remember very few specific instances, but right in the beginning of starting a D/s dynamic with my Master, there were times when he would tell me to kneel and it brought out a lot of emotions for me.
I felt it deeply. It wasn't something that came easily or naturally. I was not one of those people who had dreamed of the day I could kneel at a Master's feet. Not at all. I obeyed him: I can't remember ever refusing, but it felt awkward, a bit taboo, and fairly humiliating. All that together combined in my mind to make it arousing as heck.
It didn't take long, probably less than 10-20 times, before it felt natural to me, kneeling at his feet any time.
There was even one time when we were at a munch and I said something a bit out of line, I don't remember what, and he ordered me to kneel and kiss his feet. It wasn't a punishment, really, more of a reminder of my place. I did it without thinking, instantly, but then afterward I was self conscious about what other people around may have thought. Not that it makes any difference. But I wondered.
Now, I can't think of any place that gives more comfort and relaxation that being ordered to kneel at his feet. It is a spot of security, almost one of pride. My place.
Monday, July 4, 2016
The Butt Plug Makes a Reappearance
So yesterday I must have been particularly clueless in my own little world, because I came into the kitchen several times to wash and put away dishes, and never noticed that Master was over at the table wanking and watching porn! Finally he came to get me from out of the back room and told me we were going upstairs.
He had me put in the butt plug first. Then he took out some rope and began to tie me. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to float away as it wrapped tighter and tight around my body, eventually pinning my arms in front of me.
He threw me down on the bed, and used the flogger on my cunt while I sucked him. There was a lot of fucking, and about ninety million orgasms (slight exaggeration).
Then we did it again today! Today there was no butt plug, and no rope, but he tied my wrists with the leather strap I wear, then looped my leash through that and through my collar so I was tied up tight to the bed. Heavenly.
I love this stay-cation. Master has four days off in a row!
We didn't really do anything to celebrate the 4th today, but we had friends over on Saturday for a potluck. Today Mystique came over early because her little dog Max was having a lot of pain. Master gave her some pills to give him, so hopefully he'll feel better soon. It is in his neck.
Then Master and I went for a long walk/jog. He walks, I have to jog to keep up with him much of the time. We went over four miles and it was getting pretty hot by the end. He's been working on his talk for next week, when he agreed to give a presentation to a small munch group about Master/slave relationships. I think I'm going to have to do "Stupid slave tricks" during it. I'm not quite sure what that will mean.
He had me put in the butt plug first. Then he took out some rope and began to tie me. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to float away as it wrapped tighter and tight around my body, eventually pinning my arms in front of me.
He threw me down on the bed, and used the flogger on my cunt while I sucked him. There was a lot of fucking, and about ninety million orgasms (slight exaggeration).
Then we did it again today! Today there was no butt plug, and no rope, but he tied my wrists with the leather strap I wear, then looped my leash through that and through my collar so I was tied up tight to the bed. Heavenly.
I love this stay-cation. Master has four days off in a row!
We didn't really do anything to celebrate the 4th today, but we had friends over on Saturday for a potluck. Today Mystique came over early because her little dog Max was having a lot of pain. Master gave her some pills to give him, so hopefully he'll feel better soon. It is in his neck.
Then Master and I went for a long walk/jog. He walks, I have to jog to keep up with him much of the time. We went over four miles and it was getting pretty hot by the end. He's been working on his talk for next week, when he agreed to give a presentation to a small munch group about Master/slave relationships. I think I'm going to have to do "Stupid slave tricks" during it. I'm not quite sure what that will mean.
Sunday, July 3, 2016
On My Knees
Kneeling is a position that represents submission or deference in many cultures and places across the world. Being literally higher as representing higher status is seen in some social animals as well as humans. It is the submissive dog who grovels or rolls over, not the top dog. I'd be willing to guess that for humans as well as dogs it is an instinctive emotion, even if our current social culture has done away with most of these sorts of status displays. It makes kneeling to another person (rather than in prayer) a taboo thing for us. It is associated with begging a favor or mercy from a more powerful person or being.
The first few times I knelt in front of my Master, the strongest thing I felt was the breaking of that taboo. I was admitting by my position to not being his equal, to be being below him. It felt humiliating, but in the best possible way. I was humble before him.
Now all the taboo is gone for me, and a lot of the humiliation. My favorite thing is to kneel or sit at his feet. Every night (unless he gets to bed before me) I spend some time kneeling in wait for him, and I generally spend that time thinking about submission to him, and about being a good slave.
Kneeling: Kink of the Week
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| Satyricon, Petronius |
The first few times I knelt in front of my Master, the strongest thing I felt was the breaking of that taboo. I was admitting by my position to not being his equal, to be being below him. It felt humiliating, but in the best possible way. I was humble before him.
Now all the taboo is gone for me, and a lot of the humiliation. My favorite thing is to kneel or sit at his feet. Every night (unless he gets to bed before me) I spend some time kneeling in wait for him, and I generally spend that time thinking about submission to him, and about being a good slave.
Kneeling: Kink of the Week
Saturday, July 2, 2016
Ladder Game
Last night I didn't think he was going to want anything before bed. Thursday night (actually 1:30 am Friday morning) we'd had sex. Then again Friday morning. The kind of sex where you cling to each other for comfort. The kind that reassures you of continuing life in the face of the terrors of death. I felt I was hoarding his semen, his life essence he'd given me. I had a primal almost-wish that he'd give me a baby (I know there won't be, thank goodness, because IUD. But still. It was one of those lower brainstem wishes that has nothing to do with rational thought).
Friday night we watched the last of the new season of Orange Is the New Black (ack, all the rough emotions of the first episode that I almost couldn't watch are back!).
When I came up to bed after letting dogs out one last time and then feeding them, Master was already there. He said he wanted to beat me, and told me to get a blanket and lie on the bed. He snapped the leash to my collar. I lay on my stomach.
He started in teasing me with little taps of the cane, then a huge swishing hard one that hit right beside me on the bed. For minutes and minutes this went on. He said "We call this building anticipation in the Master biz. You know about Master biz? It's a lot like masturbates, but with more slave girls involved." Haha.
He began to hit harder, and I lost track of what was going on. After a while, he said we were going to play the ladder game with 20 rungs. You know the ladder game of caning?
First rung: one blow
Second rung: one, two
Third rung: one, two, three
...and so on.
Then once you get to the top rung, at 20 this time, you have to climb back down the ladder.
At the top rung he told me that we could substitute touches of the hot lighter for some of the rungs if I wanted. I felt a shiver of fear, but at the same time, acceptance of my fate.
"Whatever you want, Master."
I could feel, more than hear or see, his smile.
He said I could orgasm on the final rung.
Top rung: 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15... down to one.
Next rung: 19, 18, 17, 16...
Rung eighteen: a click and heat on the back of my thigh.
Rung seventeen: another touch of the lighter
I was pretty out of it by then. But when I felt it between my legs the fear came rushing back and I squirmed. I couldn't go anywhere, so I don't even know why, but squirming happens.
Rung sixteen on my shoulder muscle (ow): 16, 15, 14...
Around rung five I felt the orgasm building.
It went on like that until the lowest rung: ONE. I came without any other command needed.
He knelt beside my face and told me to suck his cock. The feelings were swirling all around my mind then: relief, gratitude, eagerness to please him were at the top of it all.
Then he ordered me on to my stomach and fucked me from behind to finish.
Friday night we watched the last of the new season of Orange Is the New Black (ack, all the rough emotions of the first episode that I almost couldn't watch are back!).
When I came up to bed after letting dogs out one last time and then feeding them, Master was already there. He said he wanted to beat me, and told me to get a blanket and lie on the bed. He snapped the leash to my collar. I lay on my stomach.
He started in teasing me with little taps of the cane, then a huge swishing hard one that hit right beside me on the bed. For minutes and minutes this went on. He said "We call this building anticipation in the Master biz. You know about Master biz? It's a lot like masturbates, but with more slave girls involved." Haha.
He began to hit harder, and I lost track of what was going on. After a while, he said we were going to play the ladder game with 20 rungs. You know the ladder game of caning?
First rung: one blow
Second rung: one, two
Third rung: one, two, three
...and so on.
Then once you get to the top rung, at 20 this time, you have to climb back down the ladder.
At the top rung he told me that we could substitute touches of the hot lighter for some of the rungs if I wanted. I felt a shiver of fear, but at the same time, acceptance of my fate.
"Whatever you want, Master."
I could feel, more than hear or see, his smile.
He said I could orgasm on the final rung.
Top rung: 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15... down to one.
Next rung: 19, 18, 17, 16...
Rung eighteen: a click and heat on the back of my thigh.
Rung seventeen: another touch of the lighter
I was pretty out of it by then. But when I felt it between my legs the fear came rushing back and I squirmed. I couldn't go anywhere, so I don't even know why, but squirming happens.
Rung sixteen on my shoulder muscle (ow): 16, 15, 14...
Around rung five I felt the orgasm building.
It went on like that until the lowest rung: ONE. I came without any other command needed.
He knelt beside my face and told me to suck his cock. The feelings were swirling all around my mind then: relief, gratitude, eagerness to please him were at the top of it all.
Then he ordered me on to my stomach and fucked me from behind to finish.
Friday, July 1, 2016
He Gave The Order
Yesterday, just as he was leaving for work, I went to him for my goodbye kiss and he said "Shave it". He'd been talking about having me go back to bald pussy for a few weeks, so I knew it was coming. He told me to leave just tuft of hair. It took me quite a while to get the job done, about 45 minutes, one scissors and two razors. It was a jungle down there. I probably could have used a machete.
I think I like it this way, though, it is all sensitive now.
I think I like it this way, though, it is all sensitive now.
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