That Was a Close One

Today I am thankful that I didn't completely destroy my blog.  I tried yesterday to change the look of it on a template and all the gadgets and everything vanished so I had a heck of a time getting it back to where I could even find the "design" button.  All the links to other blogs were gone.  I almost panicked.  But I fixed it back the way it was.  Whew!

Our snow doesn't look this pretty yet; this is from last year.  But it's coming soon!  Right now we have about an inch of the cold stuff.
 

Disgusting Is Sexy

Why?  I don't know.  I have a vast humiliation fetish, so it just is. 

I was on my knees in front of him, my hands bound together with the leather strap.  He told me to look up at him adoringly as I sucked his cock.  I tried to look up, but my "adoringly" was more like "squinty-eyed straining" because that's hard to do.

He bent over and spit.  Directly. In. My. Eye.  It was just as gross as you'd imagine, but I only sucked harder and more eagerly.  When he told me to get on the bed I was trying to surreptitiously wipe my eye on the sheets, but with my hands still bound in front of me they couldn't do anything to help.   


After he was done beating and fucking me we took a shower together.  Again I was on my knees in front of him getting an additional shower time golden treat.  I held my tits up for him to get a cupping effect and target.  

With A Little Thoughfulness It Doesn't Take Much Time

As he was on his way out the door this morning, he asked me to get his lunch ready and gave me a shopping list.  Then he kissed me with my robe opened, and told me to come out and get the gate for him.   As I was getting my boots, coat and hat on he told me he was going to rub snow on my tits before he left. 

He got all the way out to the gate in his car, and I was standing there with it open. 

"I didn't pick up any snow", he said.

I admit I didn't look disappointed. 

"Slave, pick up some snow and rub it on your nipple".   I bent over, picked up a small handful of fluffy new snow, opened my coat and robe and rubbed it as he said.  It was a little cold, but not as bad as I feared.   He kissed me again when I leaned into the car and we said goodbye.   

 With a little thoughtfulness it doesn't take much time to be a cruel Master.

TMI Tuesday

1. If married, had you slept with any of your wedding guests not including the person you married? How many of the guests had you slept with?

No.  When we got married I had slept with two people.  Only one of them was at the wedding (my Master). 

  2. Weddings again–Ever gone to a wedding and hooked up with another guests?

No.  I have always gone with Master, and never to any kinky weddings where a group scene might happen.  Though, now that I think about it, that sounds fun.

  3. Do you get along with your partner’s family? Why or why not?

Pretty well.  I think I'm easy to get along with. 

  4. Who in your romantic relationship is usually the first to apologize after a fight?

Usually me.  We don't hardly fight at all though.

  5. When was the last time you dreamed about your partner? What it a good dream or a nightmare?

I don't remember. 

Bonus: Do you think that fate or destiny play a role in love?

No. 

 https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2018/11/26/tmi-tuesday-november-27-2018/

On Sunday

On Sunday Master beat me with a belt.  He tied my hands together with a strap when I wasn't holding still very well. More belt came raining down.   He fastened clamps to my nipples and it hurt like hell, but was a relief when they came off.  I was crazily turned on, dreading and loving at the same time.  Then he fastened the clamp by one end to my cunt and beat me some more.  He decided I needed weight on the chain so he clamped the other end to a bottle of lotion.  Lotion was just dangling there between my legs by the chain.   He had me spin in circles until the chain went out at an angle from my body, still only attached to my cunt lip. I got totally dizzy from the spinning.   He guided me to the bed and fucked me, encouraging me on with cane and hand.   I had many, many orgasms.   Right in the middle of the fucking he told me that he was going to order me to do something terrible later that night.  I was going to have to tie him up and interrogate him.   It did sound terrible.

He began tormenting me mentally with various things I had done, until I felt really bad.  I kept making up silly stories to get out of it, but he wouldn't let me. I don't know what to think sometimes, about being forgiven and yet not really forgiven.  


Then he stopped, and I had a few hours to think about it, about what I was going to do to him later on.

Last time we were with Dr. Peter, Master had complained to him that when he tried to get me to torture him I didn't do it right.  So this time I was determined to do it more like he does to me.  I was going to be cruel and heartless.  Well, right after I got down on my knees to suck his cock, THEN I was going to be cruel and terrible.   First the sucking, then the cruelty.  

But once I was on my knees I didn't want to stop.  I waited for him to stop me, but he didn't.  Finally I asked him if he wanted to lie down in bed (So much for cruel?).   Once I had his hands tied I got  determined again.  I was going for the interrogation which had no right answers.  I got out the nipple clamps.  I put them on him.  He said it wasn't that bad, so I pulled on them a bunch.  He didn't really seem to enjoy it, but he didn't complain.  Then I took them off and put one on his penis (yeah I did!).   This honestly made me feel sorta squeamish and not happy at all, so I took it off.  I teased him a little bit and then got out the short cane, the one that he broke on my ass.   
I did my interrogation bit, but I felt very silly.  I teased him and smacked him with the cane.  I don't think he liked that part at all.  I felt kinda bad afterward.  

Although he said he wanted more tormenting and interrogation, I think he really just wanted more cock sucking and teasing.   

He came inside me, but when I tried to come I couldn't.  He let me use a toy afterward, but I gave up on it after a while of nothing happening.   

Today I am thankful that when things break, we have the money to get them fixed.  Yeah, right when we got the new furnace, the fridge broke.  It's better now, though, it needed some little fridgey-part. 

Paingasms

Today I'm thankful for my Master wanting to hurt me.  I will make horrible faces and moan and groan, but in the end I love it.

Thankful Part Three

Today I am grateful that my Master used me for his pleasure.  I'm grateful for his dominance and control.  I'm thankful for our new furnace and the fact that I don't have to make a fire this morning unless I want to (which I don't).  

Thankful Part Two

Today I am thankful for an uneventful and delicious Thanksgiving meal.  The weather was good for driving, and also was ok (mid 30s) for letting the fire go out and the pipes not freezing while we were gone all afternoon, the kids were perfect, the food all turned out great.  It couldn't have been better, really.  We got to see our friends again, that we don't see often enough.   Our kids and their middle child still get along great. 

Thankful

 1. We are getting a new furnace tomorrow.
2. We are getting some new living room furniture. The old ones are falling apart.
3. Puppies with soft ears.
4. Pocktopus.
5. My family.
6. Master's love.
7. Friends.
8. Good food, and plenty of it.
9. Sleeping well at night.
10.  Readers of my blog!

Accidental Voyeur

I was at the park in the middle of the day, playing Pokemon, sitting in the car to warm up after my walk with the dog, and noticed two people in a car nearby doing "stuff".  I tried not to look, not wanting to be rude.  But she seemed to be over on his side of the car an awful lot. 

After a while they noticed me sitting in my car and they both got out and walked away.  I didn't think anything more of it until one of my Pokemon playing friends pulled his car up next to mine.  He said he was parked on the other side of the parking lot but some people came over and were doing "stuff" in a car (here he made a lot of wild gestures showing exactly what they were doing) and he had to move his car so as not to not see it. 

I'm finding the whole thing rather amusing. 

Role Playing Tuesday

When I got home Tuesday, Master called me upstairs almost immediately.  He threw me down hard on the bed and took a spoon to my ass.   It was painful but I was getting really worked up.  Once I was warmed up with beating he started fucking me sideways on the bed until my head was hanging backwards over the edge. I had to hold on to him to keep from falling off the bed.  Then he had me be on top.  He told me he wanted to stop and do a little role play thing.  He described the whole scene to me asked me if I could do it.  I said yes, of course. 

I was playing an anatomy student and he was the TA who was going to help me "study".   It got pretty hot and a little rapey, the way I like it.  He really loved it and thought I was very good, although as the "TA" I only raised my grade a few points, so I'll have to try again if I want an A.  

See, the way the grading scale works is:
Cunt= C
Blowjob= B
Anal= A

Such a Bad Day

I had such a bad morning on Thursday. I woke up feeling ok, but then one thing after another was going wrong and soon I was crying, hiding in the bathroom.  Master made me come out and give him a blowjob, right there on the floor in front of the bathroom, still crying.  I was quite miserable but I did it and felt humiliated about it, and not in the fun way.  Sad, angry, humiliated, it all roiled around in my mind painfully. 

He ordered me to stop crying and come out to open the gate for him because he was heading out.

He also told me I had to play with myself and have an orgasm after he left.

I did play with my toy, angrily, but I did not enjoy it. Ok, maybe I enjoyed it a little bit because I did orgasm. 

Later on, I was questioning my whole life up to this point, especially the being a slave part.  I just didn't feel sure any more.  

 Thursday night when we had to go to parent/teacher conferences Master was in such a good mood and was so nice to me I couldn't be mad or sad anymore.  Later that night in bed I confessed how I had been feeling and it told me it was ok to have doubts and was glad I shared them.  He held me tight, and the fucked me, which I really enjoyed.

Friday I found some hay for sale and Master talked the husband of one of his co workers into helping me haul it.  That was 85 bales, it was hard work, it took 4 hours while Master was at work, but since I was down to my last few bales to feed the sheep, having this hay all in the barn is taking a huge weight of worry of my mind.  I've been searching for hay to buy for quite some time, and most people were sold out.  

Every one of my muscles aches now, but that's a good soreness. That's an "I moved 2 tons of hay onto a trailer and then off the trailer into the barn (the harder part because of how far we have to carry them) with only a couple helpers" kind of soreness.   My minivan was also filled with hay, and I still need to vacuum that out. 

Friday night Master was gone because he had to do a sleep study to see if he has sleep apnea.   Saturday morning he came home and we had a marathon fuck session. I don't know how long it was, but it was immensely satisfying.    We had planned on a date in Madison but the woman we were meeting was sick and couldn't do it.  This was actually fine with me, because although I know I would have enjoyed playing with her (I always do), I was pretty tired and sore and not really feeling like going out.  

That didn't stop me from going grocery shopping, making cookies, going out with Master to play Pokemon, and then going to a work dinner party with him.  He was dreading the party, but as a work event it was required.  We actually ended up having a lot of fun there.  Free food and drink, silly games, crazy people, whee! I had 2 Black Russians and was highly happy, but I ate waaaay too much.

Lunch Date

The light filtering in over the bookshelves and stacks of books was clear and bright and cold.  Lunch had just been completed and discussion of history, politics, movies and other topics was underway when my Master ordered me to pull my shirt down to expose my nipples. Our host had gotten up from the table to get more water.    Master had been teasing me all morning, getting me so aroused that my whole body felt like one big sex instrument.  I was thrumming.  I had worn a very low cut blouse, one that maybe shouldn't be worn in public without an undershirt, and certainly not without a bra or undershirt as I was doing today.  

We weren't really in public though.

I pulled the stretchy, polka dot fabric down, exposing my breasts completely.  I felt a little shy and yet daring.  One side had slipped back up as I moved, so by the time Dr. Peter returned to the table only one nipple was out.    The conversation continued like nothing was different for a few minutes until he mentioned being distracted by a nipple.  

Master took that opportunity to move things along and in a minute we were all standing in the kitchen.  He grabbed me and pulled down my shirt completely.  My Master drew back his hand and aimed a full swing at me but I flinched back so he just barely grazed me.

"Are you flinching?" he demanded. 

I apologized and tried to hold still.  I had my back to the refrigerator now, scared but excited.  The next few slaps to my breasts were right on target and very painful.  I couldn't flinch backwards any more. 



We then headed toward the bedroom.  On the way there, I ditched my tights and underwear beside the front door next to my boots and purse.

Master pushed me down hard on the bed face first.  He lifted my skirt.  Dr. Peter stroked me.  I got my glasses off just in time to have both my arms pinned behind my back and tied with the leather cuffs. 

They both caned and paddled me for a long time, taking turns.  When I was moaning too much Master went and got my panties.  First he shoved them up hard in my cunt to get them good and wet, then into my mouth for a gag.   After the full side of my back was done, from neck to the bottom of my feet, they flipped me over, taking off the cuffs so I could lie flat, and caned my poor sore tits as well.  Master had some sort of rubber kosh thing.  They were talking about how you could break bones with this. But they didn't hit me that hard, luckily!

Master told Dr. Peter that I would like to spit roasted- fucked in both ends at once, and Dr. Peter agreed that would be fun.  They had me between them, my mouth and cunt both filled with cocks, several different positions.  It was such a pleasure I can't even describe it.  Sometimes Master would stop fucking me and beat my ass with an implement again.  I was trying my best not to stop sucking anyway.   It's challenging for sure.

When they had both come, we collapsed on the bed for a little bit more political and historical discussion.  They share so many of the same interests.  I could barely think, so I wasn't much use there.  Somehow it's always my brains that get fucked out.  

Not that I'm complaining! 


Then we had tea and apple crisp. 

TMI Tuesday

 
1. Name 3 things that most excite your imagination when you imagine doing them? (I know TMI Tuesday blog is number one, so name three other things).

Going to India.  Or Greece. Or Australia.

2. When sleeping with your significant other (yes, actually sleeping) do you like to cuddle up or do you prefer sleeping away from them nestled in your own blanket cocoon?

I like to cuddle up when it's cold.  When it's hot, then sleeping nearby and holding hands is good.  

3. Would you rather:
a. Drive 200 miles well over the legally drunk limit?
or
b. Drive 200 miles after being awake for 72 hours?

Either one seems like a certain death sentence to me, but I guess I'd pick the second one.  Maybe I'd fall asleep the first time I stopped for gas. I've never in my life been awake for 72 hours.  The most is about 26 hours.

4. Would you rather:
a. Be topless all the time
or
b. Pantless all the time

Pantless.  More easy access for the important bits. Plus I could still be wearing a skirt.  LOOPHOLE.

5. What is something you could talk about for hours?

My dogs.  I probably have, too.

Bonus: What is something you could talk about for hours and not bore people to death?

 Hahaahaa.  Which people? 

https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2018/11/12/tmi-tuesday-november-13-2018/

Poll Results

It's still open if you haven't voted yet. No ID needed.

But here are the results so far:

a. Sex and beatings: 2
b. Life etc. 0
c. Sex and beatings and life etc. 4
d. Something else 0

So the big winner is a little of this and a little of that, which I can definitely do!   Thank you ever

Ready or Not

My Master was fucking me this morning and he presented the nipple clamps to me.  

"Are you ready for these and a big orgasm?" he asked.

I nodded. 
 
He attached one and it hurt like the very devil.
 
"No, no, no," I cried, "I'm not ready for those at all".
  
He attached the other one.

He thrust into me hard, slapped my face and told me to come. 
 I gushed everywhere.  

He said, "I guess you were ready after all."  

Here's the fuzz:

 

Sex 'n' Beatings

Thursday night Master punched me in the ass a little bit and then we went to sleep, but didn't have sex (we don't do it EVERY day).

Friday night we went to bed early though.  Not to sleep, just to bed.   We snuggled down under the blankets and I reached down and started fondling his cock.  After a few minutes he pushed the blankets away and told me to suck it.  He had me move my ass around to him so he could hit me with the cane at the same time.  It felt awfully nice.  Hard enough to sting but not so hard that I wanted to flee. 

He fucked me and gave me some little orgasms, then he came inside me from behind.  He kept on playing with me with the glass dildo and the bullet vibe and even though it took a very long time I eventually had a huge orgasm.   I had to beg for it at that point when it was feeling just about inevitable.   

Today he had to work in the morning, and tonight also, but in between we spent a few hours playing Pokemon out in the cold.   I'm sitting by my new space heater since we are still furnace-less and Master was getting worried about the pipes freezing in the part of the house not warmed that much by the wood stove. 

He also wants me to post pictures of my fuzzy cunt since he's been having me grow my hair out.  I might do that tomorrow.

It's Not a Trap

I was washing dishes and we started talking about this and that, punching people mostly, and I said I bet he couldn't punch me hard enough to make me cry.  He thought maybe this was some kind of trap.   

He punched me in the arm.  I laughed. For some strange reason I found myself telling him that was a funny one.  He punched me in the arm again, same spot, and then two more times, just as hard on all of them.  I was still laughing but also admitting that it really hurt.  So he punched me a couple more times in the same spot and I couldn't hold up the dish I was washing anymore.  I started shrinking away.  

It turned out it wasn't a trap at all.  I don't know why he thought it was.  I just like getting punched, is all.  :)  

A Little Poll

I told my Master I haven't been writing as much because it feels like what I write is repetitive: beatings/sex, beatings/sex.  I haven't lost any enthusiasm for doing it- but writing about it feels like I must be writing the same blog over and over.   

He suggested I take a poll, so here it is.

What would the couple people still reading this blog most like to read?

a. more sex/beatings

b. what I'm doing every day that's not sex and beating

c. some of each

d.  other? Fill in the blank

TMI Tuesday; I told you so!

1. Do you go out of your way to be nice?

Sometimes, sure.  I haven't killed anyone yet.  

2. Some time ago people were buried with items they would need in the afterlife, what would you want buried with you so you could use it in the afterlife?

I would have about a dozen small figures of dogs representing my real dogs.  Maybe two dozen.  There's no such thing as too many dogs in the afterlife.  And some little toy sheep.  

3. What social stigma does society need to get over?

Slut shaming.  

4. When was the last time you told someone “I told you so.”?

Omg.  I bite my tongue every day on that one.  I don't consider it nice.  But I do think it a lot.  

5. When was the last time you were snooping, and found something you wish you hadn’t? What did you find?

I don't think this has ever happened to me.  Not that I haven't ever snooped, but I never found anything bad.  

Bonus: What small seemingly insignificant thing did your parents or someone else say when you were a child that has stuck with you all this time?

My mom told me that when she took me to a softball game (as she did all the time when she played softball) I won a prize for "dirtiest child" after taking dust baths in the infield.  

https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2018/11/05/tmi-tuesday-november-6-2018/

Good Lord, ancilla

Last night we went out to dinner with a bunch of Master's co-workers and former co-workers.  He warned me ahead of time that they are a rowdy bunch who like to talk about sex all the time.  

I was sitting there eating my onion rings and sipping my Spotted Cow when I caught the tail end of something my Master was saying to one girl "You should talk to our friend Dr. Peter about that".

I jumped in with a surprised, "About what?!"

Master gave me a look which told me he was reading exactly what was in my mind. 

"Good lord, ancilla! he exclaimed. (except he used my real name).

Everyone laughed uproariously, I blushed, they all repeated
"Good lord, ancilla," over and over, making me blush and laugh even more.   I told them he could read exactly what was in my mind.  They all guessed it was something naughty, but they had no idea HOW naughty, I'm sure.  

He just wanted her to talk to Dr. Peter about the field of psychology.   Ooops!  

Female Domination: KOTW

Do you love a dominant woman? What it is about that dynamic and personality that makes your blood pump? What is your gender in relation to this kink? Do you love the idea of a whip wielding leather clad mistress or maybe you like something ‘less in your face'?

I have a feeling I could never belong entirely to a woman, even if I had never met my Master.   There is something about most dominant women that I couldn't deal with, and it's not the lack of a penis.  This could be a terrible stereotype, but many of the dominant women I know are just not that into sex and play on a regular basis.  I mean, sure, they love it.  Sometimes.  But there can be a long drought between those times with them not really missing either one.  And I'm a greedy slut.

However, I have been attracted to several dominant women, and I've enjoyed playing with them, especially Mystique.   I have little interest in the leather/latex/high heel stereotype, but I really am into the whip wielding part as a masochist.  My gender is female, kink has no bearing on that for me.  My sexuality is pansexual, which means I can be attracted to all sorts of people, not that I am attracted to every single person.