Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Life and Love

This week has been busy.   I am working a lot, for me, plus doing all the stuff I usually do at home.   I probably shouldn't complain, since this is most likely what most people's lives look like.   I'm certainly working less than I did when I was 25.  But then we didn't have kids, the farm, the dogs, and I wasn't a slave. 
Every night that we sit down to watch a movie I fall asleep.  I can't remember the last time I watched a whole movie.   He wakes me up at 10, I feed the dogs,  we go up to bed.   Last night I was in such a bad mood that I hid out from everyone all evening as much as I could after making dinner.  I did more loads of laundry.  I folded clothes.  I vacuumed.  I read my book in bed.

At bedtime, after the dog feeding excitement (10 dogs make a lot of excitement when the food bowls are coming out) we finally went upstairs, I put my leather collar on, got undressed, waited on the floor with his crop.  It wasn't terribly cold in our room, but it wasn't warm either.  

Master came into the room, made a low sound that might have been "mmm" or perhaps something else.
He took the crop from me, then pushed me backwards and took me right there.   After just a few minutes he stopped (ohhhh!) and said I needed some beating.   He whacked me pretty hard with the crop as I lay on the floor and wiggled.  I think I was trying to get away but he was holding on to my leg.   Then he told me to suck cock, which I did, keeping one eye cocked (heh) to the side looking out for the crop.  Instead he reached for the long willow cane, which was right there handy, and beat me fairly hard.  I squirmed, tried to get away, wiggled from side to side, but he had a grip on my hair and his cock was in my mouth.   I don't know if this is any good for him when I'm half focused on pleasing him and half focused on my increasingly sore ass, but he seemes to enjoy it.  

Every now and then he'd stop and ask me "Do you need more beating, slave?" and I'd of course say "Yes, Master".   Of course I do.  What other answer is there? 

Finally my answer started to be a very shaky, agonized "I don't know Master, whatever you want". 

He bent me foward, head down on the floor, and snapped with the whip across my rear, my thighs, inner thighs, my cunt.   Ohhh and ohhh!
Then he knelt behind me and said "Surprise" which only means one thing around here.  A little drip of lube and his dick was shoved into my ass.  

See, it's not really ass rape if you yell surprise first.  

I heard that somewhere. 

Monday, October 29, 2012

STFU.... and no smirking

This weekend I was gone, off doing dog stuff, and had great time, even with just about freezing to death.  The same weather that seems great in short bursts, giving you energy while running from house to barn, or house to car, or even going for a brisk walk, doesn't seem all that great when you are required to sit or stand for hours in one spot, your muscles gradually going completely stiff from not moving and being cold.  Eventually constant shivering sets in, and you wish for a cup of hot coffee, a warm fire, or both, plus being in bed under the blankets.    But it really is worth it, and after checking with Master, I have signed up to do it again next year.

Plus they bought me an all you can eat ribs dinner which was out of this world, and it came with apple strudel.  YUM!!!

Anyway, that was not what my blog was supposed to be about today.  

On the way home from work today we were talking about food, and cooking, and Master started telling me about what he had read by Ruth Reichl about cooking pork chops.  She says that if you start them in a cold pan and heat them gradually they will be more tender than the way I normally cook all meat, which is to start with a searing hot pan.   In my obtuse way, I started saying that I'm not sure I believed that and I was going to test it out by cooking pork chops in two different pans next time, one hot and one cold to start.


But he took my arguing that as questioning the wisdom of his idol Ruthie.   He threatened me with a caning if I didn't agree with him.  So I said "Yes, Master". 

"Smirking like fucking Anne Boleyn does not show the proper fear and respect for your Master." He says.

"I'm sorry, I'll stop".   Still smirking.

"You really want to be caned, don't you?"

"Umm?"    That is a trick question, right? 

Then he went on about how great it was with the wrap around belt blow to the boob last week, how cool it was that I was sore for days afterward, and how he'd love to try out some belt wrap around shots to the cunt.  Describing in detail how lovely it was going to be.   And very soon instead of smirking and squirming I was just squirming, because this was starting to sound like not quite so much fun.   

Friday, October 26, 2012


A friend's writing inspired my blog today.

Yesterday, driving home from lunch with my Master, I brought up a topic that is not easy for me to discuss.  

Fear.  It's not easy because in a way I'm afraid to admit to fear of being hurt.    I'm afraid that if I admit to finding something scary he won't do it.  And that is completely stupid and backwards thinking.  It has no basis in reality because from all the evidence, the fear, the trembling anticipation, is his favorite part.  Or perhaps I just don't like to admit how well it works on me.

Sometimes, when I know he plans to hurt me, I am afraid.  He makes me wait, alone in our room, naked, kneeling, perhaps holding the implement to be used on me, getting wet at the thought of it.   The anticipations builds.  We both know that if he changed his mind I'd be horribly disappointed.  I likened the fear to the thrills of a roller coaster ride when you know it is about to plunge you down really fast and you're going to scream.   But it is more than that, so much more, because I crave this kind of pain. I wake up thinking about it and I go to bed feeling it, if I'm lucky.

The nipple is still sore today.  "Something to remember me by", he says.   I'm going on a little trip this weekend, all by myself.  I'm trying to put a positive light on it, but I don't want to leave home, don't want to be away from him at all.    

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Have you ever?

Have you ever...

Been pulled over?
Yes, I've gotten a few speeding tickets, three in total, I think.  I have been pulled over and not gotten a ticket a few times.  Lead foot.

Dyed your hair?
Yes, I have dyed it occasionally to a slightly reddish/blondish color instead of dark blonde as it naturally is.

Pulled an all-nighter?
Only once.  I had to finish a paper for high school English class and stayed up all night to do it.  I turned the paper in, then went home and went to sleep, missing the rest of the day.  I like sleep.

Baked a cake?
Yes, I have baked lots of cakes, even a few that didn't start with a box.

Fallen down in public?
Oh, many times.  Too many to count, really.  Mostly from being knocked down by sheep.

Been caught making out?
 Follow up question: By a cop? No, not by a cop.

Taken a pregnancy test?
Yes, several.

Broken a bone?
Nope, I've never yet had a broken bone.

Had braces?
  Yes, I had braces, and it was horrible.
Gone skinny dipping?
Yes, once with a mixed sex group of people I barely knew at an SCA event.   That was fun.  Plenty of times just with Master.

Built something out of wood?
I took a woodshop class and built several nice things.  Since then I have built lots of fences and other practical wood things around the farm.  Nothing fancy.  I have also done some wood carving.  I made a wooden cat for Master that is quite cute.

Been to Disneyland?
No, nor Disneyworld.  Haven't really wanted to.  My kids have been, though.

Eaten a Krispy Kreme donut?
Yes, although they are not my favorite kind of donut.  The best donuts I've ever eaten were made by an Amish family.

Screamed during a scary movie?
Yes, especially when Master grabs me suddenly (see Cabin in the Woods blog).

Showered with someone of the opposite sex?
yes , just today in fact :)

Been to a professional sporting event?
Baseball, mostly.   I used to go watch the Cardinals at Busch stadium.

Slept till noon?
yes.Maybe.  Probably?  I can't really remember.

Been arrested?

Opened Christmas presents early?
Our family sometimes opens them early, but all together.  No sneaky opening for me.  One of our kids once unwrapped all the presents early (he was 3).

Played Scrabble?
yes, I do.  Master always wins.  He knows all the obscure Scrabble words.

Rolled down a hill?
yes, not recently though.  When I was a kid.

Toilet papered someone's house?
No, I don't think I ever did that.

Laughed so hard you cried?
Yes, I have.

Burned yourself with a curling iron?
Yes, long ago- I haven't owned a curling iron in years.
Been hit on by someone too old?
Too old for what?   I don't know, maybe.

Gotten seasick?
No.  I get carsick pretty easily, but never seasick. I've never been out in rough seas, though.

Eaten food that fell on the floor?
Yes, if it was something really yummy and didn't land in a ball of fluff.

Given a hickey?

Shared a sucker with your dog?
No, ew.  I know the stuff they lick.   I don't even really like suckers.

Been in an accident?
Yes, several, mostly on icy roads. I did a 360 on the highway once. That was scary- we ended up in a ditch.  Once I hit a deer.
Had chickenpox?
yes.  I remember how horrible it was.  My mom would take me riding on her bicycle because the cool winds made me feel better.

Spied on your neighbors?
Yes, my bedroom when I grew up looked down on our neighbors' living room and sometimes I'd watch them.

Plucked your eyebrows?

Ridden in a limo?
No, never

Had a pet fish?
yes - we have a whole take of  fish (cichlids) right now.  Really, they are Master's fish, but part mine too, I guess.

Lied about your age?
Yes, when I wanted to be served alcohol underage.   Not since then.

Bought something at a yard sale?
yes - love yard sales!

Fired a gun?
Yes, I have been target shooting and trap shooting.    Rifle and shotgun.

Been drunk?
Oh yes.  Plenty.

Been ice skating?
Yes, I used to do it a lot more.  Now my feet are kind of bad and will not tolerate skates.

Handed out candy to trick-or-treaters?
Yes, when we lived in the city.

Been in the hospital?
yes. Concussion, appendix out, two babies.

Made a prank call?

Gotten a tattoo?
Nope, no tattoos.

Ridden a horse?
I have owned several horses and been riding lots of times.

Been to Europe?
Yes, France twice, also Italy, England, Denmark, Sweden, Norway

Built a fire?
yes lots of times

Slept Naked?
Yes, always, unless it's really cold, then I get PJs

Had a manicure?
No, never

Been to the circus?
Yes, a bunch.  I love it, especially the horses.


I just want to say that a belt wraparound shot to the nipple fucking hurts. 

We had a glorious day today.   However, it still hurts.  And he keeps pinching it, saying "Is this the sore one?"  And when I shriek or whimper he has one thing to say "Suffer, bitch".   This is the punchline from a joke about a monkey and an elephant.  It's starting to not be my favorite joke so much anymore. 

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

How to say "I love you"...

... so your slave will understand. 

As follows: 

Master was heading out to work, but wanted me to come keep him company while he put on his shoes.   He told me to take of my pants (actually fuzzy red pj bottoms -so sexy, right?) and lie on the floor.   Then he told me to stick my fingers deep in my cunt and tell him how much I wanted to get fucked.   He told me to cum, then made me stand up again, slightly tippy now.   He held me and kissed the top of  my head. 

Discussions on an Open Relationship

Even though in my mind it is incredibly hot when he says "I will do whatever I want" with others, this is not quite the whole reality.   We both accepted that it is his right to have sex with others, or to order me to have sex with others.  This agreement was present since I became his slave, because to us that is what being a slave meant- that he had all the rights, and I had given my rights up to tell him what he could or could not do to become his thing, his property.

But because he cares about my feelings, and doesn't want to push me past the breaking point of what I could stand, which he thinks  is a very real possibility, we engage in these discussions of jealousy and feelings about playing with others.   
That these sorts of discussions are not something I want to do, but I have to anyway because he wants to have them, is kind of an ironic twist on the whole thing.  Most of the time I would rather he just said "This is what we are doing with others, you will do it and either like it or suck it up."   But in reality I have much more choice in what I do with other people than I do in what I do with Master (as in, no choice on the latter item). 

He's not yet sure exactly how far he wants to share me, but he's only possessive of certain things, certain acts.   He does not have a "Hands completely off my slave" zealously protective approach to me.   I can't really say why, these are just his feelings about the whole issue.  Recently he asked someone else to use the command to make me come, while she was playing with me.  She did, and I did.  

I haven't felt much jealousy at all lately.  This is not just wishful or romantic thinking, or denial, because it used to be an issue for me, but that was probably 20 years ago. Since then I have gotten comfortable with the idea that he does not want to replace me, that he really does want me and love me even with all my not so lovable traits and imperfections. 

He insists that I tell him exactly what would make me jealous, and what I would enjoy as far as watching him with someone else.  I have a bit of the voyeur.  :)  
So I do tell him, to the best of my ability to predict my feelings about things that have not happened yet, and also fully about my feelings about things we have done with others (all positive experiences for me so far). 
When he finds those jealous feelings, he uses them to weave fantasies for me, staying just on the edge of what I am comfortable with, never letting me get too comfortable, but staying away from the deep end where I'd be angry and upset.   In this way he has been training me, pushing me,  for a long time, semi-consciously (on my part anyway), to be really and truly ok with everything he does, or wants to do.  

Monday, October 22, 2012

Working together

I think I have mentioned this here before, but Master and I do work together.  We work for a small family business where the husband owns the place and his wife does the accounting and bills.   My Master is an associate vet.   I am a receptionist- I answer the phone, make appointments, fax things, type records, take money from people when they leave (cashier), that kind of thing.  I also play with cute puppies and kittens, clean up messes, hold animals, take photographs, answer the world's wackiest questions with patience and cheerfulness (Will the distemper shot give my dog a bad temper? OMG my dog has a flea- should I panic?)  and whatever fill in job needs to be done. 

Today at lunch I warmed up leftover lasagna for us, we ate, I washed our dishes while Master saw one more animal, then we walked to the gym and did some weight lifting for just a few minutes before walking back.   It seemed a little silly in that we didn't get much workout done, but at least we tried, and we got to walk and talk.

On the drive home Master said he was feeling kind of tense.  That was a cue.  :) 
He likes getting road head.  I know, it's not the safest thing, but what he wants, he gets.  I sucked his cock all the way home, and he especially enjoyed the bumpiness of the back roads.   His car has darkly tinted windows, and there is hardly any traffic on the little country roads we take, so no real worries of being seen.   When we pulled into the garage he told me to get in his lap and fuck, which I did.  It felt like being teenagers again- it's been a really long time since we've done that.  :) 

He came, I came, then I struggled back off (this car sex is kind of awkward and cramped) his lap, and he turned me over and spanked me into a tingly-ass state. 

After dinner and dish washing, during which I flirted shamelessly with him,  he pulled me off upstairs, stripped my clothes off and laid me on the floor.  He stuck two fingers inside me, one for each hole, as I bucked and moaned and he made me come several times.   Then I assumed the ass whacking position, kneeling, head on the floor, butt up, and he caned me.  I kicked my feet and struggled to stay in position.  He beat on my upturned ass until I reached subspace.  He led me to the bed, and fucked me (again!!) until he came. 

He told me I should be sure to write it all down in my blog for him, so here I am, as assigned.

I sure do love all this togetherness. 

Sunday, October 21, 2012


Some fall leaves, for no reason in particular.  I took this in front of our house.
Serving is something with which I struggle.  I want to do it well, at least in theory.  But when it comes to actually doing it I'm a big slacker.  Sure, I have no trouble when he says "Make some tea" or "Get me some lunch, please", I can do that.   But when it comes to anticipating when he's about to ask for something, or may need another cup of tea, I completely fall down on the job.  I get wrapped up in doing my own stuff.   I have kind of a one track mind that way.   He doesn't have a little bell to ring when he wants me, and I don't know if he'd use it if I gave him one.   Or, more likely, I would deeply regret ever having such an idea.  

Saturday, October 20, 2012

If you hit it...

If you hit it long enough and hard enough, eventually it WILL bruise.  This is how my thigh looks today- the bruise was from Wednesday night.   Or possibly Thursday.  Or some of each.   There are some more around the back, but it is harder to get pictures of that side. 

Reminders of good times.  :) :)

This morning Master wanted biscuits and sausages, so I made some.  These biscuits are my specialty, he says.   I use the Joy of Cooking recipe for drop biscuits, and they are very yummy.   Then he headed off to visit friends, so I'm just sitting around the house today, not doing much except some laundry.  

Earlier, in the warmth of a cozy bed and the dim light of predawn morning, we made love.  Or fucked.  Or some of each.    When he was just barely awake I sneaked down under the covers and woke him up completely in the only way I am allowed.   He had recently changed his "Do not wake me up" rule to "It is ok on my day off to wake me up at a reasonable hour (ie. not 5 am) if you do it with my cock in your mouth."    So today I took it in my mind to do just that.  His half-sleepy thrusting into my mouth and holding down of my head against him was so hot.
 He asked me what I wanted, and this time my answer was "Whatever you want, Master".   I'm trainable, really I am.  Eventually.  
He told me to get on top, so he could pinch my nipples, slap my face and watch me cum.  

I hope I do not sound like a broken record in saying how lucky I feel to be his slave.     

Friday, October 19, 2012

The little things

When you don't have time or energy or privacy for the big things, there are always the little things. 

We were at work.  I was in the front office, he was in the back.  I looked over the Dutch door just in time to see him look at me, catch my eye and crook his finger at me with a beckoning gesture.  I  immediately went to see what he wanted, which was just to show me the new lab coats that came in.  But that look.  And the finger.  It has been on my mind all afternoon. 

Thursday, October 18, 2012


Kneeling at his feet, describing my fantasies, begging, pleasing him, sucking cock.

My morning began with this.

The cane was just what I needed and he put it to good use on me.   But mostly what I wanted was the long, hard, fucking while I was bound on the bed.    I had many, many orgasms.

Then when he was done he used the cane on me again, and the magic wand at the same time.

 After giving the wand to me to hold in place he held his hand over my face until I thought I'd explode, then released it and commanded me to cum.

Breathe and explode.

And again. And again. And again. 

Breathe and explode.

Then he told me to start and continue orgasming as long as I could, and I went on for a long time.  I didn't know how long (three minutes- he was timing), but it didn't stop until he gave me the the "WAIT" command which after a great struggle with myself I managed to obey, without moving the Hitachi from it's position.

He kept this up until I felt like each one was being ripped out of my body.  My mind was going kerflut, and all it contained was pleasure, no real thoughts of any kind.  I was deep into subspace by this time, and when he finally told me to turn it off and lay back to cuddle me I felt very odd, like any touch or kiss was an electric shock.  I tried not to pull back, tried to still my odd feelings.   Finally we just lay quietly in each others arms. 

He said "If you want to get pissed on in the shower then we'd better get up."    Ummmm, yeah.    So I hauled my bruised ass up out of bed, staggered around the room collecting my house shoes and robe and headed to the bathroom.  We showered together;  he had me kneel for the experience (and made me cum again whilst he was at it).

I washed and shaved, but several times I was so dizzy and faint I had to sit down in the tub. He asked me if I had eaten earlier like he told me to, and I said yes, I'd had a piece of banana bread.     I was still laughing and happy -- this is what  subspace is like for me.   I completely forgot to wash my hair, and didn't realize it until much later.  I was so out of it-- I really am not usually quite THAT forgetful. 

We headed to town, and stopped by the dentist.   Master was chatting with the receptionist when he said "Ask her what she did all morning", indicating me with a nod of his chin.  The receptionist chirped to me "So, what did you do all morning?"   Being ridiculously bad at making up things on the spot, I just blushed and looked down.  She just said "Never mind, I won't ask" and laughed. 

Then we went for a lovely breakfast of french toast (for me) and potato pancakes (for him) at a restaurant.  We chatted about this and that and had a delicious time.  Breakfast at 1 pm, why not?  

Cheshire Grin

That is what Master gets on his face when I tell him how desperate I am.  Why exactly this makes him so happy I'm not sure.   But making him happy is on top of my list of things to do, so I'm sure I shall continue to let him know when I am in that state.    It doesn't mean he's going to DO anything about it, he may just enjoy keeping me in a horny state for a while.   

Last night he gave me the choice- beating or fucking.  After much hemming and hawing and wishing for both, I said I'd have the beating.   Now, he didn't tell me until this morning that the correct answer would have been "Whatever you want, Master".  Which I totally should know by now, but I can claim that my brain was confused by surging hormones.  Or something.  Dumb slave.

He was quite thorough with the paddle, so this morning I had some tender spots.   He also invented a fun (?) new game called "If you breath, I hit you".  Not a fancy name, but accurate enough.   It's kind of a breath play thing, I guess, but I have to hold my breath as long as I can, then when I finally have to breathe again he hits me with the paddle a whole bunch while he makes me orgasm at the same time.   By the time the game started I was already plenty sore and those extra paddlings were quite painful. 

"Here, hold this for a picture" he says

A cup paddle made by "Paddles of Distinction" AKA his "subspace communicator"

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Want and Denial

Sex or a lot of pain.  I needed one or the other.     He used the whip on me, and the floggers, and the paddle (hard) and still I felt like a great black hole of want.  More pain.  Or sex.  One of those, you pick, Master.  But he was done and went to sleep.  I lay in bed for what seemed like hours, trying to be good, trying to be patient and not cry in frustration.    But I just lay there wanting, unfucked.  

This morning I told him how much I still was needy and wanting and he told me "suffer, bitch" which is about the only answer that makes me feel better, oddly enough.   I expect a beating tonight, and possibly he will have sex with me tomorrow.  If I'm lucky.    When I get like this I feel so pathetically needy.  It's not like I have to wait weeks or anything, a few days is bad enough.    

Tuesday, October 16, 2012


Last night I snuggled up to Master's chest as he stood in the kitchen and, putting on my most winsome expression, looked up at him and said:

"Are you going to play with me tonight?"

He said "No.  (pause) I'm going to beat your ass.  I don't play I live this stuff fucking serious-- 24/7, baby!"
"By the way, some of those people in those groups you belong to  really are pompous asses, aren't they?" 

I'm going to say this again, even though I already know the answer (which is that I'm a wimp).   How can it hurt so much that I'm crying, wanting to fall down to escape or run away, and still the next morning the only evidence is two tiny scratches?   

He is really enjoying the new whip, as am I.

He says I make him look like a big meanie on here, which he totally is not.   If you know my Master, you know he is a sweet, darling, courteous man with only the best of motives.   (And no, he did not force me to say that, only suggested).

Monday, October 15, 2012

All the good things...

My life is pretty darn good.   The job is ok, kids are doing great, Master is wonderful.  I have good friends and a wonderful family.   Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky (knocking on the table).  I'm not ecstatic today, in fact I'm pretty worn out after a very long day at work, but I am content.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Bonus- butt sex!

Me: "Wanna have sex?"  (No beating around the bush for me)

Him (playing on the computer):  "Yes, absolutely, but I want to win this game first."

Me (knowing this game ( Civ 5) and how it can take hours for a few turns): "Can I go lie in bed and read my book?"

Him: "No".  

Then he put his foot on my foot to show me exactly where I would be staying until the game was done.  I sat.  I waited.  He teased me, touching me now and then, making me cum with a gesture.  Eventually I slid off, got my book and came back to my seat beside him. 
You know, I felt good that he wanted me there with him, but also extremely impatient and frustrated to have to wait for him to finish the game.  I don't really know how long it took, since there wasn't a clock nearby and I don't have a functional watch.  The last time I mentioned getting new batteries for my watch he said no, I don't need to worry about that, he'll tell me what to do and when.  So far that has worked, but I do wonder about the passage of time occasionally.   I did finish a few chapters.

Finally, the game was won, and we headed upstairs.  He stopped at the bathroom and said  "You better go ahead and get something in your ass".

This is a kind gesture, a warning, instead of "Surprise!  Butt sex!".  I near-sprinted down the hall, threw a towel on the bed, grabbed the lube and anal beads and shoved them on in there.  One, two, three beads... then Master was there.  He had me lie on my back and continue with the process.  A few more, while he watched. 

"Good enough, now roll over-- keep that in".  

I did so, and he began striking my ass with the cane.  That, plus the beads, was an incredible sensation and I was near to cumming right away.   He  could tell, and told me to cum.  I came.

More caning.  Then he told me to take the toy out. I did so, grimacing and making faces the whole time.

"Does that hurt?"

"No".  (Those are my "happy grimaces")

He put on lots of lube and slid in.  I buried my face in the pillow to keep from screaming.    In spite of the toy use and the lube the ass was still tight and resistant.  I was really gnawing on that pillow.

"Does that hurt?" 

"Yes"  (moan, whimper)

"Good, take it".

After a few more seconds it felt good, for a few thrusts, then it felt like all the lube had just vanished and, good god, it hurt.  I was still trying to eat the pillow. 

I couldn't say anything fun, no dirty talk, just trying to make no noise at all, my mouth stuffed with pillow.   He came, and I came at the same time, as he ordered, which took away all the pain in an avalanche of ecstasy.  

Ahhhh :).  

Talking whips

We do not have a large collection of toys, but it seems to be growing slowly but constantly.  When we first started it was just hand or belt spankings.   The a crop.  Then one flogger.  Then two floggers.  Now we have 4 floggers- maybe if we close them all in a closet together they will breed and multiply.  

I have always had a thing for whips.  Just the sound of a loud crack makes me tremble and shake.  When the first Indiana Jones movie came out my best friend and I each bought 12 foot bullwhips and would stand out in the front yard learning to crack them.  We never hit anyone, except our own legs accidentally, of course.  I still have that bullwhip, and I recently replaced the cracker at the tip so it will make noise again.  I don't think it is something Master would ever use on me- it is the advanced model of a single tail and besides it is too long to be used indoors. 

It was recommended to us to get a dragon tail first, before trying a single tail, so he did.  I love that one very much.  It surprised me that the loudest pops do not equal the most ouch factor- I haven't looked into the physics of that and since I can't see what is going on behind me, I haven't observed it much either. 

Dragon tail

Recently he acquired a short whip from the same person who made the dragon tail.   So far he has used it on me three times, including last night.    He started with my breasts, swishing it back and forth across in a figure 8 pattern.  It just barely stung, certainly not hard enough to make me yelp or leave marks.  It was enough to make my eyes brighten up and my cunt wet.

New whip

He told me to turn around.   I gripped the edge of my dresser and he began popping the whip on my back.   This was hard enough to elicit some yelps, and probably there were red marks, but nothing lasting.  After a few minutes I was getting all soft and easy feeling.  He told me to kneel and suck, and called me dirty names- whore, slut, cocksucker.  With each one I melted a little more.  He held my head and pulled me down on his cock until I gagged, let me pull back a second, and then pulled me down, enjoying my gagging and struggling as he fucked my mouth..
 He was in reach of the toy drawer, and pulled out a cane, the long willow one that I made.   He tapped and beat my ass with it, which made me squirm from one side to the other.  I don't think I was trying to get away, and I keep telling the body to hold still, but my body for some reason pulls back from which ever side he is working on and shifts toward the other side.  Thus the squirming back and forth.

He fucked me there on the floor, hard and fast, making me cum.

After care consisted of him jumping up and leaving the room.  I cleaned myself up, picked up the toys and climbed into bed.    We are not big into the cult of aftercare, with all the little extras, but I do like some hugs and cuddling when he is in the mood.   Of course, as a slave I only get what I want when he is in the mood, so there it is.  I deal.  I snuggled down under the quilts to wait for him.  

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Sick and Twisted-- Me?

I got up early today.

Master needed to be on the road by 5:30 am, so I got up to turn on the computer for him (looking up last minute directions) and make tea.  Since I was up, it was also my privilege to open and close the driveway gate for him so he could just drive through. In the rain.  Live to serve-- my new motto. 

 He wasn't too happy about getting up so early to go to an out of town meeting, something about "pop the weasel" which he tried to explain, but I still don't really understand.

When I said "Have a good day",  I meant it. I went on to add that I always liked getting up early to go on a road trip; it's kind of exciting leaving before dawn. He said "Yeah, but you are a sick and twisted cunt."
That gave me my chuckle of the day.   

After he left, instead of going back to bed I started doing laundry and cleaning.  Truly sick and twisted, I know.

Thursday, October 11, 2012


There is so much I want to write about today... and.... I can't. 

I'll just leave you with a picture instead, and the impression of a lot of fun being had by many holes this morning.   I told my Master that I nearly cried from both the belt and the wooden paddle, but that is the way I like it.   It was amazing, simply amazing. 

Also, and this was from last night, I had an accidental (not under command) orgasm from being whipped, with no touching, no ropes, nothing like that going on, simply the whip.   That is a first for me.  

Googly Eyes

See, you think you're getting some nice therapeutic Chinese firecupping and then some very "funny" people put googly eyes on your butt, take pictures and make you post them.

People seem to find this sort of thing really entertaining (glaring round at Master and friends). 

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

A sticky mess

Today is my day to stay home and do the housework.   We always have a few minutes after the kids leave and before my Master heads off to work, and if I'm lucky he will make use of me during that time. 
This morning he told me to come keep him company upstairs.  I started to get wet at the thought of what was coming.    He had me kneel and suck his cock in the bathroom.  He commanded me to cum several times during this, which is easy for me even without being touched because I get so aroused from having him in my mouth.  

He stood me up and bent me over the sink, fucked me hard and briefly then had me on my knees again for more sucking.   He didn't come, but pulled out and roughly used my hair to dry himself.  

He told me to hang his robe up in our room; when I came back he pushed me up against the wall in the hallway, his hand around my throat and he whispered to me graphically about fucking someone else.  His other hand when between my legs and he told me to cum. When I finished shuddering, we went downstairs.

 He sat down in a kitchen chair and asked me to bring his shoes.   I knelt in front of him while he polished them- his black dress shoes.  I figure one of these days he might teach me to do it for him, but he likes doing them himself. 

After the shoes were shined, there was more sucking as I knelt at his feet, then he told me to lie on the floor and expose myself.  I did, and he stood over me jerking off, but he stopped short of coming, and used my hair again for a napkin and headed off to work. 

  I'm a sticky mess.  My hair is full of unmentionable substances.  We will both be thinking of the pleasures tonight holds for us all day.  

Sunday, October 7, 2012

About Last zombies to be seen

Ah, last night.   Does it get any better than a great group of friends, a secret location in the woods too far from civilization for the screams to be heard, and extremely hot, naked bondage and slave-beating fun?  

I could be really lazy here and just post a link to one of my camp adventures, because we had a reprise of one of the best experiences we had there. 

Camp Tryst

But I won't.

You know how I said yesterday I was going to be laid back and let someone else be the demo bunny at the ropes class munch this time?  Well, I never even got that chance.   I was sitting way in the back, behind Master, and Sir Wieland pointed to me right away and beckoned to me to get up to the front for some demo-ing.   Not being one to resist that kind of invitation, I hopped right up there.      He's a good friend and I  love being his demo bunny/rope slut model, whatever you want to call it.

 Master learned some new rope tricks, and also bought some pretty red and blue ropes.  There were 3 rope experts (Sir Wieland, Mystique and Elevate) all helping people learn the new ties.   One that I especially liked, which Mystique showed us,  involved my arms being bound to themselves around the forearm and upper arm, giving basically no leverage to struggle, and then tied behind my back so my shoulders were forced back.  I didn't want to get out of that one, but it was already time to move on to the next tie.

After the munch we picked up some Korean take out and sake, and headed off to the woods.  This time the cabin in the woods didn't involve zombies; in fact, I did not think of zombies once while we were in the cabin. 

Now, on the way back out of the woods, when Master stopped at a deserted spot, had me leave the warm car and fucked me bent over the hood, after that, I had the thought "This would be when the zombies would get us if we were in one of those movies".  

Anyway, to get back to the in between bits, the juicy bits (heh heh):   once we were settled comfortably and warmly inside, Master ordered me to get undressed so he could tie me up.   I did, but for some reason I tried briefly to hang on to my panties, my last bit of emotional security and comfort, but he said "You can take them off now or I'll cut them off later, and I know they are one of your favorites".  So I slipped them off.

He got me all tied up, with a body harness and arms roped up securely, then our friend joined in and got tied to me.  We facing each other.  Ooo, and she is so nice and soft on that side.
Then the torments began, from Master and another friend.  There was flogging, a little light cropping, and caning, orgasms, biting, more orgasms, ("put a towel down") and other "drive the girls wild" torments.  When we were way over heated there were the frozen bottles of water applied to sensitive areas, making us jump and squeak.   It was just all around  too much fun.  More fun than you can shake a stick at.  More fun than a bushel of weasels.  

After getting untied, a brief rest and a drink of water, I was bent over a chair and Master caned me harder than before.  Not full out/ as hard as it gets caning, but hard enough to make me whimper.   A little more rest, and then I asked for some fire play with Mystique. 

I got googly eyes on my butt!  

How is that?

  Take two small fire cups, stick them to a butt, then put large googly eyes on the cups.   Everyone thought that was hilarious, and they took pictures.  I'm thinking someone will send me those pictures soon and if they are not too embarrassing I will share them.  Who am I kidding?  My Master is going to make me share them, embarrassing or not.

This BDSM stuff is SERIOUS!  Serious fun, that is. 

Saturday, October 6, 2012

So excited!!

Today we are going to our local munch, where the topic will be ROPE! 

 Last time we went to a rope class, Master teased me afterward about how I jumped to the front when they asked for volunteers for the chance to be the demo bunny (I did NOT elbow or shove anyone out of the way, contrary to his re- telling of what happened- see, this is that gaslighting thing he's trying to do- am I right?).  

So now I'm thinking I will try to hold back and be all demure and shit if volunteers are needed for demos.

After that we are going to a private play party at a secret location (oh boy!) so if anything fun transpires there I will be sure to write about it tomorrow (without, of course, mentioning anything that could be identifying for people other than Master and me.)  

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Day of Fun

  Last night, Master wanted to watch his newest zombie movie.  He wanted me to keep him company, and I wanted to be with him, but I didn't want to watch a bunch of zombies eating people..  I ended up spending most of it kneeling beside the couch facing him instead of the TV.   I was his play toy, for fondling, petting and other uses at times.   I rested my head on his lap, he petted my head.  He had me take of my shirt and he pinched my nipples until I wiggled and squirmed.  I sucked his cock, you know, the usual stuff one does.

After the movie he gave me a quick flogging and used the belt on me.   It hurt, and it was a good hurt,  but there was no sex.  Sometimes he just wants to beat me, and that is how it goes for his slave.

This morning he drove the kids to school and when he got home I was at the door waiting, wearing only a collar, wrist cuffs and a smile.   I had finished the vacuuming while he was gone so the house doesn't get overtaken by fuzzballs.

I gave him a blowjob, kneeling on the floor between his legs as he watched Bree Olson as Daphne and some chick playing Velma get it on. Don't judge. We all have our kinks.   He came down my throat, holding my head down until I gagged and tried to get away, but he had a firm grip on me. 

Then he allowed as how it was time for some rope.  He tied me up in a karada (body harness) and tied that to the rafters in our bedroom, with my hands roped together above my head.  He made sure there was a "happy knot" on my clit, so every time I moved or the rope moved I felt like I was on the edge of orgasm.   He took a few pictures of me.  I can't post the ones that show my face here, but he told me to "Quit smirking like fucking Anne Boleyn."  Rope just makes me happy, I can't help it.  The more he tells me to quit smirking the more I can't help smiling.  Especially when I'm being stimulated by the happy knot. 

He put on a CD of classical favorites:  Handel, Mozart and others; about an hour an a half of music.  He started flogging me in time to the music.  Beating your wife music- it's classy that way. 

He got out his knife and ran it over my body.  I was shivering a little at that, and asked him if he would ever cut me.
  "No, and you can stop making those eyes at me, I'm not going to.  It would be too much like work.  That is what I do all day- cut things and then sew them back up."   It really is ok with me.  I don't want to be cut, although I am a little curious.  0_o

For the entire length of the CD he worked me over, after a while untying me, alternating use of a leather strap, fucking, flogging, fucking,  cropping, and all the fun, until we were sure enough worn out.

 I'm so fricking deeply in love with this man.  On days like this I feel like the luckiest slave on earth. 

Tuesday, October 2, 2012


Ok, I wrote this out in my journal last night because I couldn't take looking at a computer screen anymore.  

Some readers I know are slaves that live with their Masters; they already know that much of this life is the mundane things that make up anyone's life.  The details may differ, depending on your job, whether you stay at home or not, and where in the world you live, but most of it is just doing what one has to do, minus the freedom to make many decisions about your own life, and hopefully interspersed with moments of ecstatic sublimity. 

I woke up at 6:30 feeling my legs being pushed apart.  I was sleepy, not horny, totally dry, and still sore from the day before when he had fucked me twice and hit me in the cunt with the flogger some unknown number of times.  Then he was on top of me and was about to fuck me, ready or not, dry or not, so I got busy with my hand to create some arousal down there.   It is not my place to say no or to demand (ha) foreplay.   Soon the soreness was worked out and it was feeling good, so very good.  He gave me the command to cum, but I didn't, couldn't.  Instead I shook my head to let him know that I had not.

"Maybe this will help you get in a better mood to obey" he said as he held his hand over my mouth and pinched my nose shut.  I couldn't breathe for a long minute.  As I started to buck and fight he let go, allowed me on quick breath, and again told me to cum.  This time I did.   Again, he closed off my air and I became a wild aroused thing.  One breath. Cum. And again.   Oh fuck.

He had me get the magic wand and use it.  Something like 6 or 7 orgasms later he pulled out and pushed my head down so he could cum in my mouth.  

A brief rest in his arms. 

"Up you get", he said "Go make some breakfast."

I stumbled downstairs and got ready for work.  There are animals that need care.  Kids that need organizing, feeding and attention.    I checked the new lamb (surprise, lamb!) and fed and watered critters while Master put some chicken and veggies in the crock pot to be ready for dinner. 

Master drove us to work and we got there a little after 8:30.   At 9:00 the school called and said the littler kid had barfed on the bus and I needed to come get him.  

The practice owner said I should do whatever I had to do.
Master told me to bring him in to work if he didn't seem too sick, so that is what I did.   He kept himself entertained playing on the computer until that got boring, then he was set to work shredding paper, which is evidently amazing fun for little boys. Who knew?

After work there was dinner, and still more chores to do.  Animals to take care of, kids that need to get homework done, have baths and story reading.  There was cleaning and laundry for me to do.  There was serving Master tea, and helping him with the wording in a recommendation letter he was working on. 

And finally, after asking if I could go to bed early, taking off my day collar, putting on the night collar and climbing into bed.   

Still kicking

  We are still hanging in there. My Master had to have surgery for something probably not cancer related, so he was off work for about a mon...