Tuesday, March 28, 2017

TMI Tuesday: All About Sex

1. What question about sex do you find hard to ask your partner?

I still find it hard to ask for anything I want.  I would rather be ruled only by what he wants, but then I have these pesky wants that come up, only I don't like to say them.

2. What question about sex do you find hard to ask anyone?

Pretty much any question.  I don't ask most people about sex that much.

3. Sexually, what are your favorite things to do?

Being tied up, beaten and fucked! 

4. Name 3 things that most excite your imagination when you imagine doing them?

Being pissed on.  Group bukkake scenes.  Humiliation during dinner parties.  Why dinner parties?  I don't know, it is just really hot that way in my fantasy. 

5. In how many countries have you had sexual relations?

Five countries, including the US.

Bonus: Describe your ideal sex partner.

My Master.   Yes, he's amazing.  

TMI Tuesday blog for other people's TMI:  https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2017/03/27/tmi-tuesday-march-28-2017/

Saturday, March 25, 2017


Sometimes the littlest events can turn into more fallout than you'd ever expect.  

If you read my very long "What Happened" post, you know what happened.  But the background stories are ever so much more complex and full of human drama.  I am not going there because it isn't my business.  Suffice to say, there is always a background story when things blow up.

The fallout for us, and for the group, is as follows:

Terrible things were said to and about myself and my Master.  The people who said those things are no longer welcome at our home for any reason.   As the saying goes "With friends like that..."

One of those people was using our barn (free) for a woodworking shop.  All that stuff is gone now after Master told them to leave if they couldn't muster up even a teeny bit of politeness.   No space for wood working is available any longer.   Guess who is going to get the fun job of cleaning up the huge mess they left?  Me, of course.  I didn't expect them to clean up the barn after themselves because I have lost a little bit more faith in humanity and gained an extra grain of cynicism. 

Our home is no longer available for any munch, party or kink activities for the group.  We in the past hosted several things each year, some kink and some vanilla parties.  Not any more.  

Mystique has cancelled all munches for the summer.  Usually these would have been held outdoors at our house or other members houses.  They may or may not resume in the fall.

Master and I are no longer attending munches, even if they resume in the fall.  I am not a member any more.  He made this decision due to the risk when people start being disagreeable and possibly vindictive, and also this was supposed to a fun thing for us.  If it isn't fun, what is the point?

 I was rather expecting to hear that we weren't going back even before he told me, but this is the hardest part for me because I still really like most of the people in the group.   He is still really angry at the things which were said by people that we really and truly believed were our friends, and especially how I was treated.  He is very protective of me.
I really looked forward with huge anticipation to often the only kinky gathering we attended each month.  But, you know what, nothing lasts forever.  We will move on to other things.

 So, those were the facts.  Then we get to my emotions, which are huge in my mind but probably completely irrelevant to everyone else.   Sad, hurt, angry.  That pretty much covers it.  Maybe a little scared of what might happen in the future, too.  I feel terrible for Mystique because she didn't deserve any of this mess either and it is very hard on her, as a most generous and caring person.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Useful Slave

I haven't decided if I like this new red page, but I was tired of the old colors, so I'm trying something new. 

I had just dropped the kid off at his game of capture the flag yesterday when Master called me from home and asked if I was coming home any time soon.   I said I was on my way, and he lowered his voice and told me,  "You better be wet and willing, bitch."  

It was all I could do to keep my car at the speed limit after that.  I wanted to fly home, but didn't want to get stopped by the Popo and get in trouble with Master too.  The whole time I was imagining being on my knees in front of him, taking his growing cock in my mouth, having my hair pulled back...

When I got home, I practically dashed up the stairs into the house. He told me to wait for him upstairs.   I took off my clothes and waited in position.  When he got there he ordered me to put my skirt back on.  Just the skirt, nothing else.

I stood next to him.  He pulled my head back by my hair so I was looking up at him.  His other hand went through my collar and twisted it.  My heart pounded.

"Do you know why I bought you?"

My mind raced around for an answer, thinking "Oh, we are doing a play thing!"  I didn't come up with anything so I replied,

"I don't know, Master".

"For sucking and fucking, of course, little slave girl.  Which one are you better at?"

Again my brain floundered.

"Both, Master?"

"We will see," he said, pushing me down to my knees by my collar.  "If you can do an adequate job with your mouth I may fuck you.  Otherwise, I might just come all over your face and leave you unsatisfied.  Would you like that, slave?"

Now I knew the right answer.

"Whatever you want, Master."  

My mouth was then busy with his cock.  I guess I did all right!

He stepped away from me and pushed me down to my hands and knees.   Throwing my skirt up over my back, he lined up, positioned himself and took me with one hard, deep thrust.  It felt violent.  I gasped and tried to relax against his further painful, pounding thrusts.  To accentuate the effect he punched me with his fist in rhythm with the fucking.

When he told me to come I did, hard.

He pulled out and ordered me up.  He held both my wrists in his one hand over my head, pinning them to the wall.   Master drew his other hand way back.  I struggled inside myself not to move as he slapped my breast hard, then drew back for another good swing.  And and few more on each.  

 He spun me, bent me over at the window sill, my hands on the chaise under it and, lifting my skirt again, he fucked me as we looked out on the pastures.  "All mine," he said to me.  "Yes, Master."  He pulled me back until I couldn't rest my hands on the chaise longue anymore.  "Put your hands on the floor."  I was very unsure about this, but I did it.  Then he proceeded to lift one of my legs up in the air so I was a tripod, and he was still fucking me!   I felt about to collapse, but I willed more strength into my arms and managed to stay up until he ordered me to orgasm.  Then I did collapse on to the floor. 

He took me to the bed and fucked me every sort of way.  At one point he had a finger in my butt.  When I was on top of him a few minutes later he put his hand up to my mouth "Suck my thumb that was in your ass."  I dutifully took his thumb in my mouth and sucked it, but knew right away that it was the clean one, that he was just messing with me.  I can tell a clean thumb from a butt thumb!

He told me repeatedly that I was a worthless cunt, just a hole, only good for fucking and barely even good for that.  I felt like I was falling down a deep well, but a little light showed at the top still, which I held on to: he doesn't mean it.  But it was so hot to be told those things while my cunt was gripping him and the pleasure built up and up into peaks, was released by orgasm, and then began building over again as he said more horrible and insulting things to me. It was fantastic.  



Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Money, Again

On Saturday Master and I went to the big city to meet up with some friends for dinner, and also a little shopping.  There is a rocks and minerals shop that Master said would be fun for many of us, so that is where we met.  I had a great time there touching and looking at everything.  I love the feel of polished rocks.  I have a small collection of them still from when I was a kid.  They had everything from cheap little polished rocks and glass beads to very expensive jewelry.   

At one point when people were deciding what to buy I asked Master if I could get something too. 

He said it was fine, as long as I spent under $20.   I ended up not finding anything I wanted for that budget, but I was thinking later about our interaction and how no one even batted an eye at it. It wasn't like we were talking quietly or anything.  It made me wonder. 

To me, as a slave, him controlling the financials and money in the household is completely natural and expected, but I realize in many relationships this would be a hard limit, or something they wouldn't like at all.  I kind of like it, even to the point of getting warm fuzzies. 

Monday, March 20, 2017

Money, Money (TMI Tuesday)

1. What did you do with your very first paycheck?

I don't even remember, it was so long ago.  Probably I put it right in the bank, knowing me.

2. Besides paying recurring bills, What did you do with your last paycheck?

My paychecks go directly into the bank, so nothing special.  Master makes almost all the money; my contribution is pretty minimal.  When I get paid in cash, he has ordered that it goes into my teapot savings and is used every year to go to Tryst.  Although, this year we won't be able to go because they aren't doing a camp in August, so if my teapot does accrue any money we could save it for another year or another kink event, possibly. 

3. There is only one bricks ‘n’ mortar store allowed to remain within 200 miles of your home. What type of store would you want this to be? You can name a type of store or the specific name of a store.

I need the grocery store.
Any grocery store would do, as long as it has fresh foods.  

4. You are only allowed and able to access one website for an entire year. What website do you choose to be your one and only?

I guess it would have to be Facebook, because that is where I get all the news from family and friends, where I message people and make plans, even where I talk to Master when he's at work.  I'm pretty Facebook dependent.

5. What makes you cringe–in life, at work, in the bedroom?

I am easily embarrassed by saying the wrong thing. It often makes me cringe and feel stupid. 
 In the bedroom, very few things make me cringe, unless Master is deliberately scaring me and then I cringe more in fear than embarrassment.   Being set on fire scares me.  

6. What can you do better–in life, at work, in the bedroom?

Oh, pretty much everything.  In life, I am bad at many things.  There is always room for improvement.  In the bedroom, Master is happy with what I do, so I feel pretty good about that part.

Bonus: If you could be anywhere right now, where would it be?

I would be with my Master, somewhere warm and sunny and private, where we could do all sorts of things to each other.  Maybe a nice hotel room on an island beach somewhere.   That sounds perfect right now.   The balcony would overlook the ocean and the walls would be quite sound proof.  


Sunday, March 19, 2017

The Ladder Game, A Fun Time

After I had given him some oral attention Master said one of my favorite sentences ever:  "Get on the bed, I'm going to cane you."

I hopped up there with a spare blanket under me.  He put the leather strap on my wrists.  He started with one of the canes we were given on Tuesday.  One is bamboo and the other a hardwood called Ramin.  Like the noodle, I guess, but really nothing like a noodle.

It felt really ouchy at first and I was thinking there must be an easier way of being than masochism.  Not that I have any choice now.  But after a while it began to feel quite a bit better.  Yay, endorphins!

Then he began the ladder game, which is simple one strike of the cane at each number, up the ladder.
One, two.
One, two, three.
One, two, three, four.

He went all the way up to 18 and those last 18 were particularly hard so I was whining and squiggling around.   Then he took me and gave me up to 20 as hard, punishing thrusts from behind.  He stopped.

"Now we just have to go back down the ladder".

With the cane of course.

20, 19, 18... right down to 1 and then

19, 18, 17...1

and so forth until it was only one.  

The last dozen or more he did on my breasts and cunt.  The very last one was just as he took me, he straightened up my head with his hand.  This is often a prelude to a slap in the face, so I shut my eyes and clenched my jaw shut (better than having it knocked crooked), but instead he slapped my breast.

He told me that up and down a 20 rung ladder equals 420 blows.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

KOTW: 69

I'm getting this one in right under the wire at the end of KOTW!

I do not think of 69 as a kink, but merely doing oral sex on each other at the same time.   My Master enjoys it, but for me I would prefer many other types of sexual pleasure.  It's not my favorite.

 When I'm sucking him, it gives me a ton of pleasure just to be pleasing him (this was learned, not something I came with factory installed).  Any licking of my bits is only distracting and I can't enjoy it.  It's like being hugged while you are in the middle of trying to perform a difficult and important piece on the piano.  Just wait, ok, hug later?   I'm enjoying my piano playing and this hug is totally throwing me off my game.  

I don't know why, but being fingered or using a vibrator while I lie on my side are not the same level of distraction for me.  I love experiencing those while I'm orally pleasuring him.  I can't explain this, but it may be a mental block thing.   I also don't like being on top when I'm receiving oral, and this is almost always the way we do 69, so that may be a lot of the problem for me.  

TMI Tuesday: All About Sex

1. What question about sex do you find hard to ask your partner? I still find it hard to ask for anything I want.  I would rather be rule...