Thursday, November 29, 2012

And part Two, in which I really do get the strap on and butt sex

I realized when I broke this post into two parts that the title of the last one was completely misleading, and I am sorry about that.   Tough titty, as they say.

After the saran wrap was cut, and the blindfold was off,  I flopped on the table in the same position, not really feeling much like getting up.
A few minutes later there was some prodding in my nether bits and the strap on entered my pussy.  This feels amazing.  I love it!  Fuckity fuck fuck! Oh boy!  After several orgasms we switched to me sitting on her lap and fucked like crazy.  It was brilliant.  Master got the lube and dripped it on my ass.  I was guessing at what was next.  First a finger, then the hook. In my butt.  Oh, now this was quite something else entirely.  Very, very nice.  Super intense.  I kinda like that hook.  

Master switched sides, and stood in front of me.  He held my wrists in a firm grip and encouraged me to fuck Mystique's cock hard and fast.  Now and then I'd get a command to cum from one of them, and I would.  We switched around through a few more positions until we were getting a bit worn out.  They put me on my knees and Master commanded me to suck both dicks at once as they stood in front of me.  This was also very hot, and I came once without even getting a command to do so.  Then I came again with the command. 

Master had me lie face down on the floor and put more lube on my butt.  He thrust in and paused for me to relax, then fucked me hard in the ass.  I didn't have to hold back on screaming this time, just let it all out.  It hurt, but it was a really good hurt, and then it didn't hurt anymore but was just really good.   In the midst of it all I briefly wondered what Mystique was thinking about all my screaming. She was lying next to me holding my hand.   More orgasms.  

Then he came too and after a bit of clean up we lay in a big pile of cuddliness for a long time and talked.  It was really, really nice and snugly. 

After Mystique left Master decided he needed more and fucked me again.  He came again too.  Then some more whacks with the big leather slapper Mystique had given him.   That was kind of owie, in a really good way.

Finally, the showers, of both kinds (wink, wink) and we went out for some lunch. 

All the emotional butthurts from last night have been replaced by the real, literal and very good kind of butthurts.

Butt Sex Thursday, or was that Strap-On Day?

Master and I had a date with Mystique today, and she had some plans for saran wrap that we had talked about.  Master had some plans also, which as I said in the earlier blog, he would not discuss. 

Everything about getting ready took a little longer than I thought this morning, and I was not quite ready to go when she arrived.  I still had not finished putting on the things Master had ordered (wrist cuffs and nipple doodads), then the timer on the pastries went off.  I have a picture of the pastries, which have raspberry filling and are yummy delicious.

And with chocolate sauce on top, it was a very decadent beginning to a morning of decadence. 

So I was scrambling a bit this morning to get the food out, get my things on, say hello all at the same time.   I served coffee and pastries, and Master looked a bit reprovingly at me and said

"Aren't you forgetting something?" 

Oh shoot.  "Tea?" I asked.

"No, you are to say 'Master and Mistress'".   I guess I had left that bit out.  It is still sometimes a sticky point for me, using titles in front of anyone except my Master.  So I did as required and then zipped off to make the tea, which I had also forgotten.

After we had eaten our pastry (I had asked Master beforehand if he wanted me to eat with them or only serve) there was a bit of relaxing.   There was an anal hook sitting on the couch.  My eye was drawn to it, but I tried not to stare too hard.  Master asked me if I thought that was going to be used today.

"Maybe." I said.

"Now put your hand here (placing my hand in his lap- oooo!).   Do you think this hook is going to be used today?"

Now I knew for sure it was.  "Yes, Master"

 then out came the saran wrap.   I got naked, and Mystique wrapped me up from shoulders to hips, with my arms pinned at my sides.   I was feeling pretty helpless already, which was the point of it all. 
A blanket was over the coffee table.  I was told to kneel and bend over the table, resting on the blanket.  More saran wrap, securing my legs and body to the table.  Now I was completely helpless.   Not entirely comfortable, but not terribly uncomfortable.  Mostly I had the happy, relaxed feeling of being secured.  Have I mentioned how I love bondage? 

Then the blindfold went on.  It is a black-out one, so unless it slips down, there is nothing to see at all, not even light and dark.

I listened carefully to the noises around me, trying to figure out what toys were coming out and what was going to happen next.  My mind was really spinning now. 

There was some touching of my exposed hinder end, and scratching, then Master flogged me (I recognize that one!).   There was more touching, but every time I came close to cumming she would pull away and say not yet.  I'd give a little moan of disappointment.   There was some spanking/paddling with various implements, and with the blindfolded, I had no idea who was doing what.   I'm still not sure now, actually, for a lot of it.  I know there are some bruises; I can still feel them.

Then someone was licking my cunt.  Ohhhhhh!    That was definitely not Master.   I was trying so hard not to cum without command, but after a while I couldn't take anymore and squirted all over.   When I finally did get the command to cum it was so violent Master thought I was going to break the table.  Wouldn't that be a great story?
More licking and fondling.   Then there was some moaning that wasn't me and it wasn't my Master.  More licking, and moaning.  I didn't know what was going on, but I had some guesses.   

The whole thing was so hot.  There was ice water dripping over me to cool me down. 

Master fucked me a little bit before they cut the saran wrap.  

To Be Continued...

Date day

This time I'm just starting with the pictures, because it's time to go and I don't have time to write more.  I'll write more later though. 

Thursday date

It's Thursday, and I'm full of nervous anticipation for what the day will bring.  We have a date.   Master hasn't told me his plans, other that little hints, scary hints, about what "might be fun".  

I woke up early and started a fire in the woodstove.  It's looking like winter here. 

Thank you, friends, for your comments on last night's frustration post.   I'm not sure it seems any better now, but Master is probably right in what he said last night about my complaints:  "You just need to be spanked". 

Wednesday, November 28, 2012


I'm feeling distinctly unslaverly tonight.  Today I worked, we came home, Master got the pizzas in the oven.   I washed dishes and did a quick clean on most of the house- picking up toys, vacuuming, etc.  
We also talked to my mom on the phone and he made a couple of comments to her that have my wheels spinning so hard they are about to fall off.  First off all, he thinks I never do anything except what I want to do.  Ok, I can name 50 things I did today that I didn't want to do.   I can name about 2 things that I did today that I really did want to do.  Evidently I just suck completely as a slave. Or something.  Also, I am a terrible housekeeper.   So now I just feel like crap.  He doesn't want to talk to me, tells me I'm being completely silly, he meant nothing at all by his comments and just says them to tease me.  I still feel crappy.  I should just go to bed.  It will probably seem better in the morning and I'll want to delete this whole thing. 

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Tuesday morning routine

Tuesday tends to have it's own special ritual in the morning.   I don't usually work, and Master has to go in, but the kids leave before he does.   So that gives us a whole precious 15 minutes or so while he gets ready for work. 

As soon as the kids are off, I head upstairs hoping for some special attention.  Most of the time I get it.  He likes to have his cock sucked while he gets ready, while he brushes his teeth, and does all that stuff (not shaving, though)..   It's kind of hot for me too.    This morning after he was done with the grooming activities he told me to stand up and bend over.  He threw my robe up over my head, took out a hairbrush and walloped me good with it a dozen or more times.   I came. 

Then he had me lie on the floor and play with myself while he watched.  I think he meant me to cum on my own, but I didn't, I couldn't, and finally he gave the command.   He took me to the bedroom and had me get on all fours on the bed, and used the cane on my ass and thighs.  I came again, several times.  I was trembling when I got on my knees again to please him.  

It is always good to start a Tuesday with a sore behind. 

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Here's a Fun Game

Lying in bed, and hearing him say "Here is a fun game..." makes me wonder what I've gotten into.   Again.

"Roll over that way"  he says, "Now say 'Unique New York, unique New York, you know you need unique New York.'"  If you mess it up I'm going to hit you.

So, carefully and with great earnestness, I said ""Unique New York, unique New York, you know you need nunique New York."


"What?" I say

"Nunique?" he says. 

I started again, very carefully, in sing-song voice:   "Unique New York, unique New York, you know you need unique New York."

"Very good, now faster" he says.

"Unique New York, unique New York, nu know nou need nunique New Nork."

Whap! Whap! Whap!

"New Neek nu Nork, Nu Neek nu Nork" I say, while giggling uncontrollably. 

"No!  Narf, narf, narf, narf",  punctuation each Narf with a giant WHAP!

We take this BDSM shit way too seriously, I know. 

And the source,

Pinky and The Brain

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Can't decide

Today I can't decide if I should write the story of our last intense playtime, or just a "what happened today" sort of post.   Or something else entirely.    I'm in one of those terrible indecisive moods. 

So maybe a potpourri, with a little bit of everything, will work.  

After asking Master if it was ok,  and making sure I knew what his rules for the outing were,  I went out to lunch today at a cozy little home style diner with a couple of good women friends.   We talked about kink, and who is seeing whom lately, who is spanking whom, and who is a bottom wanting to turn into a top and vice versa, and all kinds of things, and ate some delicious chicken dumpling soup.  Also I drank way too much coffee.  I'd already had my normal full pot in the morning at home, and the very accommodating waitress just kept coming by with refills.  It was so warm and nice, the company so good, and it was pretty tasty coffee too. 

Afterward I went shopping downtown, celebrating "Shop local Saturday" by purchasing gifts in some locally owned businesses there.  

On the beatings front, besides a little spank 'n' sex this morning, the last time was Thursday (Thanksgiving) night.   Master again used the belt and the purse strap on me.  Next to the purse strap, the belt feels positively relaxing.   Afterward he was fucking me and he got that glint in his eye, the kind that says "I dare you to try to get away".  Being the obedient slave, I asked him if I should try to get away, and he said yes, that would be hot.   So I struggled and shoved, but I couldn't even budge him.  

He decided I just wasn't trying hard enough, so he gave me a challenge.  He wasn't going to fuck me any more UNLESS I could escape from him.  So, without actually trying to hurt him, which would be a no-no, I gave it a great effort and we wrestled all over the floor.  I couldn't get away.  Finally he said he would only use his left hand, and he put the right behind his back.  He still had me in a leg lock, and I seriously could not budge his legs.  It was looking desperate, so I pinched the inside of his thigh.   Just a little bit. 

This shocked and surprised him enough that I was able to wiggle free and dance across the room.   I was jumping up and down in a little victory dance when he pointed to the floor at his feet and said "Get over here and lie down".    My victory dance instantly turned into complete submission and I did as he indicated.  

"Now I want to watch you masturbate and cum for me", he said.   I asked if he would give me the command.  No, I had to do it all on my own.  I lay on the floor, him standing over me, and I touched myself and came within just a few minutes, maybe not even a minute.  Anyway, it wasn't very long.   

"You were imagining me giving the command to cum, weren't you?" He said.

"Yes, Master", I answered.

"Such a clever slave", he said. 

Not usually, but it's nice of him to say so.  :)   

Friday, November 23, 2012

That service thing

Here service is a part of ownership; because I'm his slave he expects me to do whatever tasks he wants done.  Before I was a slave or a submissive there really was no service component as a part of my nature or inclination.   I would do things that had to be done, but with no feeling that I was doing them for any other reason.  Service is done with an intent to serve.  Othewise it is just stuff that needs to be done.   So laundry was just laundry, an annoying task that has to be done.  Getting tea for him, or other types of personal service, was something that would cause me to think "Is there a piano tied to your leg?" or just to say it straight out.  

Those types of things were only done with the greatest reluctance, foot dragging, and often procrastination.  Being held accountable for getting his tasks accomplished on time was a significant part of my enslavement.  I generally have a list of things to get done in a day.  The tasks he has given me have first priority, and after that come the ones I have set for myself to do.  This gives me comfort and security in being a slave. 

 Something switched over in me when I became owned.  It wasn't automatic or instantaneous, but it came of a different mindset, one of wanting to be pleasing, the occasional discipline when I failed to serve adequately, (generally mild, although when I just flat out said NO to dish washing one time, very early on, he punished me physically).      I  enjoy the  positive reinforcement of seeing how happy he is with me when I do things for him, plus the occasional pat on the head and "good slave" which goes back to the wanting to be pleasing.  I'd say it was his training that did a lot of the work in switching my attitude.  

Now I feel much less selfish, almost as if I have been given permission to be of service, rather than required to do it.  It's like a doorway opened for me that I had kept slammed shut before. 

When the morning is cold, like this morning, and he says he doesn't want to get out of bed, I will offer to go fetch his robe and bring it to him.  He said no this time, but then told me to get up and make him tea, and I was glad for the opportunity.

He is not as much into the anticipatory service thing.  He doesn't expect his tea to be made precisely at 7:00 every morning.  He enjoys ordering me to make the tea, and I get a little kick out of being ordered to do it, or any other little task for him. 

It often doesn't look different how than how some wives treat their husbands.  I know other women who are service oriented, but not slaves or property at all.  That is how they relate to others, maybe because of their nature or how they were raised.      I also know a few men that relate to their wives this way, without being slaves or submissives in the BDSM sense.  Interestingly enough, to me, my brother is a lot like that.   I can just picture the contented smile on his face as he brings my sister in law her first cup of coffee of the morning.

Borrowing a topic from ti-ti-oo on fetlife.

Thursday, November 22, 2012


Well, I'm completely stuffed!  

We had a delicious dinner with some of our favorite people.   There was a mix of guests, some that we know from Fetlife/munches/kink land, and some from vanilla life.   Lots of kids, who ran around a lot and made it seem like way more that there actually were. 

Our 7 year old boy is now evidently "married" to their 9 year old girl, and their child is the 4 year old little brother, who they took outside and half buried in sand.   He (the 4 year old) was very impressed that our whole garden is just "one giant sandbox".   Yeah, we know, the soil here is crap.  We don't live in Iowa or even Southern Wisconsin with that good dark soil.  It is all sand.  

As they were packing up to leave, our son was begging "Can we keep her, please? Please?"   It was very cute. 

I hope everyone out there had an equally enjoyable Thanksgiving, or just a great plain old Thursday if you're not American.   

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Pain, sex, humiliation and a new strap.

What seems to be a choice never really is.   That is the lesson from last night.  It seems like a bit of deja vu because I thought I already knew that.   

I knelt at his feet as he finished up paying bills.   He could tell by looking at me that I was, once again, wanton and needy.    He stroked my head and asked if I had the choice, what would I pick for tonight, beating or fucking?   I squirmed and kissed his arm, asking if I really had to choose.  He just repeated the question.  

"Fucking?" I asked, the question obvious in the word.

Slap, slap, slap, on each cheek.   This sounds trite, but one tear did squish out of my eye then. 

"No, you say,  'Whatever you want, Master' ".    I repeated his words.  

"That's better".  

"Upstairs now, naked, collar and wrist cuffs".   I scurried upstairs ahead of him.   I followed his directions and waited in a kneeling position on the floor.  My cunt was already soaking wet.  I had the riding crop in my mouth also, as he generally expects.  I had turned up the room heater, but it was still cold.  I was shivering and crept a little closer to the heater. 

He came in a few minutes later, not looking at me, but doing a few things first.  I couldn't see him behind me.  Then he took the crop from me.  He struck my still bruised ass a couple of times and then told me to get up so he could use the floggers.   He doesn't want those muscles to lose their memory.   It was pretty hard for flogging, these floggers that I had custom made to be extra stingy.   

After a short time he switched to a new strap, acutally the purse strap which had broked off my old purse.  It's about 1/2" wide.   Snap, snap, snap.   I squeaked and shifted around, willing myself to stand still when I kind of wanted to run off, or dodge, or something.   But I wanted this also, since what he was doing to me made my cunt drip wetly down my legs. 

Snap, snap, snap.   Across my back, butt and thighs. 

"That doesn't hurt, does it?  I'm barely snapping you."

Yes, it does actually.

"This hurts?"  Snap, snap, snap.

Yes, Master.

"Oh, I guess it did break skin a bit here". 

Oh.  I whimpered a little, feeling incredibly turned on and a teeny bit vindicated in my squeaking.  

Up close in my ear, very quietly:  "Suffer, bitch."

Snap, snap, snap... and so on.  I don't know how many exactly.     

He went back to the floggers, and my now tenderized skin was more on fire now than before.    He made me come - I had to grip the dresser to keep from falling over. 

He laid me out on the floor and fucked me, one hand entwined in my hair and with a grip on my wrist cuffs.  I was completely pinned in the most delicious way possible.  

A very short time later he got up, and said "Bed time now, slave".   I managed not to moan. I got up, cleaned off and headed for the bed, but before I got there his hand was on the back of my neck and he pushed me down on the bed in a convenient pose, ass up.  Thrusting in to me a couple times, he said I had another choice.  Oh, damn.  He told me if there was going to be more sex there was also going to be serious humiliation.  Or we could just go to sleep now.   In trepidation of what "serious humiliation" would entail I answered:

"Whatever you want, Master".   

"What a good girl, good answer." 

Sex and humiliation or just sleep?  Is that even a choice?  I'll take door # 1 please. 

He told me to get the Hitachi and get on top of him.  As we fucked he described the most humiliating scenes for me.   I'm not going to go into them,  hearing about it once was plenty.   Heat washed over me, the heat of humiliation turning into the heat of arousal.   I used the Hitachi, but even while feeling waves of approaching orgasm lapping at the door I held them off with an effort of will, until he gave me the command to come.   And again.  And again.  Until I felt completely limp and  he rolled me off, rolled me on to my stomach and fucked me that way- biting at me - he finally came as well.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

I win! I win! No, Ralph, this means you failed English.

     Me fail English?  That's unpossible!


tori at Pain's Pleasure nominated me for a blog award, so now I get to do all these questions. Yay!

For the next set of awards, I'm nominating Master's Piece (Down the Rabbit Hole)  because I love everything about her blog, and plus she lives in Australia, which is cool. It is also thanks to her that I even started a blog, after she said "You should write a blog".   And she has an awesome butt.
 And kaya (Under His Hand), because I have a crush on her, I mean, I love her writing- it doesn't matter if she writes about kink or toenail fungus, she makes it interesting.   And she gave me coffee when it was early and cold and I didn't have any, which pretty much assures her of a sainthood in my book.
Also, I nominate lil with Submissive Sanctuary, because she always gets to me emotionally in her writings.

I would nominate tori also, since I love reading her blog, but that is against the roolz.  We must follow the roolz.  (Nominating you anyway Tori)

The Monkey's Journey is another favorite.   Plus, Cookie Monster!

Sin, at Finding My Submission, of course!

MsConstanceExplains-  I really enjoy her perspective and reading about her experiences.

 Aisha- she has so many great fantasies!

And here are their questions to answer.  Don't feel obligated to do this if you don't want to, or already did a bunch of questions for someone else and are tired of it.     Feel free to just enjoy your award.   Unless you are constantly looking for topics, like me. 

1.   When did you realize were "kinky", if ever?

2.   What is your favorite fantasy?

3.   What is the fantasy that you wish would get out of your head, but keeps coming back, if there is one?

4.   Where do feel most at home?

5.   What do you most want from the person you are with, whether that is a partner/Dom/sub/slave/Master?

6.   Why do you write a blog?

7.    What is your favorite TV show?

8.    Favorite dessert?

9.  Favorite time of day?

10.   Do you believe in God/ are you a spiritual person?

11.   What is  your favorite sexual position? 

The 11 random facts:

1.  I used to be scared of dogs, and my mom put so much work into getting me past the fear that I went the other way became a "dog person" and pretty much made a life around them.

2.  I am also extremely shy and introverted, but have been trying to get past that for most of my life.  I think I went for 3 years in middle school without talking to anyone outside my family and a couple of friends.   Now I actually can talk to people!    At work I talk to people all day, as a receptionist, so I consider this a great success.

3. I love answering questions and taking surveys.  It's a compulsion.

4. I love interesting people, and people who are a bit weird, in a non-creepy way.

5.  I have very good intuition, when meeting people, about their character.  I tend to trust that.
6.  I think I'm probably the wimpiest masochist I know.   Ow!  He's about to hurt me!   But pain turns me on, if it is the right kind.

7.  I love the old Simpsons episodes.  See the blog title.   And South Park, Monty Python, Red Dwarf, Black Adder and any other humorous shows along those lines.     My nickname "ksst" came from the South Park episode "Tsst",  the one with Cesar Milan training Cartman. 

8.  I am trained to orgasm on command.  My record for most orgasms in a day is 55.   I am no longer required to count, but it is generally "a lot" when he asks me.

9.  Learning the multiplication tables was traumatic for me.   First I refused completely, then my dad quizzed me every night at dinner until I was ready to scream, then they finally sunk in.  Blech.
10.   I didn't even know I was a masochist until about a month after my Master started spanking me regularly.

11.    I love the old Victorian Style furniture and decorating, and period novels.   Fancy curlicues- Yay!


 Questions from Tori, for me to answer:

1.Where is your dream vacation spot?

Australia- see the blog from a couple days ago on why I want to go there.

2. Whats your favourite food?

Chocolate eclairs, in Paris.

3. What one thing would you change about yourself if you could?

I would have a memory like a steel trap.   What was the question again?

4. Name one thing that you love about your partner?

He is a good person, honest and kind.  That is really three things, isn't it?  Sue me.

5. Favourite film?

The Princess Bride

6. Favourite spanking implement?

A cane (I used to be scared of those too)

7. What 3 famous people (dead or alive) would you have to dinner?

I don't think I want any famous people to come to dinner, but if I had to I'll say Brad Pitt, Daniel Craig and Julia Childs.   Ms. Childs would jump in and cook for me, and the others would just stand around shirtless.  Hey, it's my fantasy.

8. How old were you when you lost your virginity?

I was 16.  It was April 1st, April Fools Day.  LOL.  I had sex with my Master in his dorm room at college.  It hurt and wasn't that fun for either of us.  Well, it was a lot more fun for him than for me.

9. What colour is your bedroom decorated in?

It is wallpapered in white with little flowers from before we moved in.  The floors are painted white wood and we have a blue area rug.  Someday we're going to redo it, as Master doesn't really like it. 

10. Do you have any pets?

Yes, a lot.  We have a pack of dogs, a cat, and a tank full of cichlids (fish).  For farm animals we also have chickens, ducks and sheep.


When one receives the award, one posts 11 random facts about oneself and answers the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
Pass the award onto 11 other blogs (while making sure one notifies the blogger that one nominated them!)
One writes up 11 NEW questions directed towards YOUR nominees.
One is not allowed to nominate the blog who nominated one's own blog!
One pastes the award picture into one's blog. (You can google the image, there are plenty of them).

Monday, November 19, 2012

Fixing stuff

"I'm not going to beat you like I did last night" he said.

Nevertheless, I have a pretty good new bruise on the opposite side from the one caused by the referenced beathing above.

It's completely true, what he said, that beating was entirely different from the night before.  He may not have expended as much time and effort on it last night, but what he did was very focused and plenty hard enough.   The opening announcement though, had led me to expect something very different, like maybe tender lovemaking (ha ha).   Well, anyway, you might be able to guess how I felt about that, and if not, I'll tell you- I much prefer the hard way. 

In addition:

I wanted to write something profound, or at least thoughtful, or even possibly slightly interesting tonight.  But it's getting late, I can't think of anything, and I spent most of the evening kneeling on the floor outside the upstairs bathroom, waiting for Master to have me fetch things for him as he worked on fixing the toilet.  So ultra romantic, eh?

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Asking for it

Throwing myself under the bus is one thing, but sometimes I am just asking for it.  I mean literally, like last night.  We were all curled up on the couch watching The Assassination of Jesse James (second half- we both fell asleep for the first half) and I leaned over to Master and said "I would really like a hard beating tonight, would that be ok?"

Yes, slaves are allowed to ask for what they want here.  Doesn't mean I'll get it, but I can always ask.  He wanted to know if I thought I'd done something wrong, but no, I hadn't, I just had that nagging need to be in pain on the floor, crying.   Why?  Who knows? Who cares.

He told me to go get  the paddle and the wooden spoon.  And put on his zombie movie.  Why do zombie movies go with ass whackings?    I trembled a little,  just a little frisson, like cresting the top of the first hill on the roller coaster. 

He started out really lightly patting me with the spoon as I laid across his lap.  Pat pat pat.   Long pause.  Pat pat pat. Impatience and patience were warring in my head.   Gradually getting harder and harder.  He used the paddle some also.  Then the Same Damn Spot song came out.   Pretty soon a large welty thing was raised on the one damn spot.   I can still feel that spot now- it has a pretty good bruise on it. 

After about half an hour he said we should move upstairs and get serious about this.   I took off my clothes, put on my bed time collar and waited, kneeling on the bedroom floor, cold. 

Master came in and pushed me over backwards, thrusting into me and fucking me just a little, before getting up and telling me to get up and grab the dresser.

Flogging first, after draping it over my face and letting me smell the leather,  then the cane, and then he got the paddle again and made some serious dents with it.   It hurt, a lot, and I started crying.   I collapsed on the ground, and got a couple more very hard whacks on the butt with the paddle.   If this were an interrogation I would have confessed to the assassination plot by now, I know I would have.  But all I did was huddle on the floor and cry.   He turned me over, and started working my front with the cane.  My hands were in the way, so he told me to spread my arms on the floor and he stood above me, on my hands, so they couldn't move.  From there he caned my breasts, not so hard as to cause agony, just hard enough that I could feel it.  And the rest of me, especially inner thighs and very sensitive cunt, got some attention too. 

He switched positions and raised my legs up in the air, meaning to cane the backs of my thighs.  I was shaking my head no, no, no.  Whack, whack and some more whacks right in the most sensitive spots.  Really hard, or at least it seemed so to me.   I was shaking my head no,no and crying again.   Then he fucked me and I was completely flying.  That is the best, just simply the best, after all the pain and orgasms (I had a lot of orgasms during the beating) to be fucked hard from behind. 

Saturday, November 17, 2012

The Tease

It's not my fault I'm constantly horny.  At least that is what I tell myself.   It's him.  It's his teasing that does it.

I was sitting here by the computer last night and he walked past and just reached out and pinched my nipple.   I looked up at him, sighed, moaned, stretched against him.  He said "You're so cute when you're desperately horny." And then he went off to bed by himself and fell asleep.


Just a couple of holes

Master and I woke up this morning with some touching and fondling.  I stroked his cock, loving the feeling of it getting hard under my hand.  He pushed my head down for some attention from my mouth.

When he was good and awake he told me I was going to be just a hole, or two, for him this morning.  No longer a slave, wife or lover, simply a place for him to stick his cock and get off.  I was not allowed to ask for things, say anything, not even moan or answer questions. 
"Do you understand, slave?" he demanded.  

When I said nothing at all, didn't even look up, he said "Good" and proceeded to direct me and move me about for his pleasure.   I had some huge orgasms, on command (evidently this is a part of his pleasure- the pulsing sensations), but I made no replies to his questions, made very few moans, as much as I could stifle them, and asked for nothing. 

I love this sort of objectification, and he knows it.   I enjoy thinking of myself as his thing to be used for pleasure.   It's not something we could do all the time, since at other times he really loves my real reactions, and not having them stifled.  But every now and then he gets in a mood to just have some holes to use. 

Friday, November 16, 2012

Why I want to go to Australia

This says it all:

Australian fabulous-ness


Master thought I really needed to elaborate on the last post because it was too vague.  I admit it was intentionally vague because it was embarrassing.  I behaved badly, and, I didn't really want to write about it. 

So here is the rest of the story.   That particular night from my previous blog, (Tuesday, I think) Master was really tired and told me I probably wouldn't be getting fucked or any nightly beating.  Ok, so I was really horny, but  I could suck it up and just go to bed too if he were tired.  

But when we got ready for bed he got out a cane and was just tapping at me lightly with it while we were talking.   I really didn't think he wanted to do anything, and I really didn't want it at that moment either, having pretty much given up hopes, so I kind of sidled away and off to bed. 

Well, in case you can't guess,  that was the WRONG answer.  

He came after me, got on top of me and forced my legs apart, I was trying to explain that I really didn't want to because I knew he was tired.  But he told me I was being a cunt, and that he wanted me to accept a rather half hearted beating rather than walk away from him.    Yes Master, I can do that next time.   I felt absolutely miserable as he lectured about me acting like a total cunt, being pouty,  and so on.   Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.

He was inside me for just a minute, then pulled out and took the wooden spoon off the side table.  He beat my ass hard with it until I was squirming and trying to get away, and had me take his cock in my mouth and pleasure him, while he continued to beat me.  This was hard for me as I was also trying to get away from the spoon at the same time.   That wooden spoon really hurts.

   It took me a while to wrap my head around it and not feel horrible, then he insisted that I write it out.  

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Simple but not easy

Sometimes the choice is simple but not easy.  Either suck it up and be a slave, or act like a cunt.    

I'm choosing the first one.

On the positive side, though, I got used for my holes morning and night, and my butt is more sore than I thought it would be.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Ask for an opinion, get an honest answer

Master made up a new song.  It goes kind of like this

 "Same damn spot, same damn spot, same damn spot.
 Everybody likes the same damn spot. 
Same damn spot, same damn spot, same damn spot.... "

and so on.  For a long time.   Each word of course in punctuated by a whack with the wooden spoon on my butt... in... the... same... damn... spot. 

I'm rolling around, twisting and wriggling, and he's still hitting his mark.  I was pretty near crying.  He's keeping his dick in my mouth, I'm trying to suck it but every time a hard one hits I jump away and then he lets me have a few more harder ones for stopping, so  I go back to it.    Then he pauses and asks what I think of his "Same damn spot" song.   Can I say "fine" or "good" or anything at all sensible?  No.

  I say "It's kind of monotonous, Master."  

"Oh really?"

And it starts up again. 

This is going in the "Things not to say" handbook. 

Sending out

No, not for pizza.  

Last night we started early.  I promised not to scream.  I'd eat a pillow if I had to.

As I was stripping my clothes he told me to put on my leather collar.  I knelt on the floor, eagerly sucked his cock, enjoying the feeling of it growing in my mouth.  He pushed me down so my face was on the floor, my ass up.  He gave it a few experimental taps with the cane, and then some hard blows that made me squeak and jump.    He got the belt.  This seriously is the most entry-level toy we have.  And by that I mean something easy to pick up and use from just his normal wardrobe.   It  still can inflict pain quicker than anything else.   Again the few testing slaps, then some hard snaps.  I stayed still and quiet, waiting for the pain to come.  Snap! to the place where my thigh meets my bottom.  Snap! on the inner thigh.  Ohhhh gods.  Snap! on the lower back.  A few more. And then a few more.

He told me to stand up, and briefly flogged me.  This part was restful compared to the other. 

Foreplay done, he ordered me to get on the bed, face down.  I did, already gripping the blankets in my fists and pillow in my teeth.  He had told me that morning what he intended to do and hadn't changed his mind.   I was looking forward to it and fearing it at the same time, as I always do.

He used lube, he went slowly, and I imagined myself being open to him, imagining myself into relaxing.  Then when he cock was half in he ordered me to cum.  I fought against it, but came anyway.  I couldn't help it, even knowing all my muscles were going to tighten and send pain screaming through my ass.  I chomped on my pillow harder.   I bucked up against him, burying his cock deep in my ass.   He began thrusting hard, and I felt completely open to him.  It felt amazing.  "Come!" he commanded and I did again, this time not as painfully.   For a few more thrusts it was deeply and invasively good.  Then it began to hurt again.  I started begging him to come. Please come now, Master, please.  Harder and faster he moved, and went on and on.  I swear it was like a marathon ass fuck.   Finally I couldn't take it anymore and I sent my mind out.  I don't know if it was subspace, dissassociation, or zen bliss/ trance state, but my mind went away and took pain with it.  I was limp as a rag doll.  As he orgasmed he ordered me to come.  I did, coming back to myself and orgasming, just as he pulled out.   We lay cuddled together in a heap of blankets and total bliss. 

Sunday, November 11, 2012

The eyebrow

It doesn't take much to dominate me. Not much time.  Not much effort.   Merely an eyebrow in this case.

He asked me a question.  I replied with a "Yes, that would be nice". 

The eyebrow went up.  

A hastily amended version followed:   "Yes, that would be nice, Master".

I think he's cracking down on this, because in the last 4 days I've had my face slapped at least three times for leaving off "Master" when he thought it would be appropriate (ie. any time there are no kids/ vanilla people in the room).    This time I only got the eyebrow.   Possibly only because I was out of arm's reach. 

Drop and emotion

After Thursday I have had a serious case of sub drop.  I think.  I'm actually not sure what is going on, but there are have been a lot of emotions running around in my brain after I got over the high of the experience.

All these questions keep nagging at me, and I can't figure out how to deal with them.   I have talked to my Master, but when I ask things like "I am too slutty?" he says "No, of course not, don't be silly."  Then I don't know what to say.    I can't say "But what if I really am too slutty?" and then to add to that:  "What if I shouldn't have written it all down for everyone to read?  Wouldn't it be better to just keep it all in my head?  What will people reading this think of me?   Will they demand things from me or take liberties, and what if I want to say no and I don't?  Are you sure I'm not too slutty?"

Of course what I really want is for him to slap me around and tell me to shut up and do as I'm told.   This seems to make everything better, because then it's not ME being slutty, it's him commanding me.   But this time he didn't. 

Instead, we had a conversation.  No, neither of us want to change course or do anything differently.   Yes, we want to do the same things again, and more.  Yes, his rules for me regarding other men are still in place.  His conflicting emotions about that revolve around whether his willingness to share me means that he doesn't value me.    Yes, he values me.   Yes, he shares me without jealousy, and how do those things go together? It was causing him some cognitive dissonance.   He finally decided that it is because sharing me doesn't devalue me in any way.  We both have a good time. He still knows he owns me, and I know it.  

This is my own analogy.    It's like eating a big bowl of ice cream but sharing some with a good friend.  It brings more enjoyment to the experience to share, not less, because there is a lot of ice cream there, more than one person could eat. 

I think it is enviable how he manages to sum up and deal with his emotions that way.  It seems neat and tidy from here.  In my own head, I don't feel upset or unhappy today, I'm just having these thoughts spinning around in my head.  I have questions, and I know the answers, but still the questions keep nagging at me.

The answer, I know, is the same one it always is:  "Just obey". 

It simplifies things down to the bare level of what this is about.  It is what I do.

If he says this is what we are doing, then this is what we are doing.   Obey without over- thinking things.  Enjoy without guilt.   I can do this.  

Friday, November 9, 2012

The pictures

From Thursday.

First, getting tied up, caned, flogged, etc. 

These are vampire gloves.  They somehow got left out of my story ( with a few other things) but they were used mostly for breast slapping and also some butt spanking.  I was deep in subspace at the time and all I can remember is pain and some confusion about whether the spiky tack side was hitting me or not.   After a few smacks with the spiky side it was hard to tell.  

The paddle with the heart cut outs makes heart shapes

Some of the toys that were used

Those whips did leave some marks.

I'm still just wiped out from yesterday.  My cunt is sore, my sides are sore, everything is sore.  But mostly I just think about how much fun we had.  Master had an amazing time as well. He keeps talking about how hot it was. 

Thursday, November 8, 2012

I have a heart-on

Mystique said "Oh, no, we're not done with you yet." 

She got out the violet wand.   She zapped me with it, and then had me lie on the one end of it of the long cord attachment.  When in constant contact with me it didn't zap, but as soon as I moved it started zapping my back and I leapt up.  I really wasn't too keen on that.  But I laid back down when ordered,  with it firmly behind me, so now I only got shocked when touched by her or my Master.  My whole body was the conductor, so every where fingers brushed me I got zapped.   They were touching all over the place and I started giggling, then laughing.   It was overwhelming, but not really painful, just tickly and zappy.    I have to say it was more fun than at the munch, but I'm still not convinced is it actually FUN.  

They let me up and I got on my knees to suck Master's cock.   She was flicking me with a whip at the same time.  Now this I like.   He told me to cum.  I did.  She took my hair in her hands and used it as a handle to help him fuck my mouth.  There was a lot going on, he was fondling her, and what I mostly remember is the choking and gagging, and her behind me, forcing me down deeper and faster and harder.    When she took hold of his cock and balls and was jacking him into my mouth he nearly came, but held off.  I was gagging in a serious way now, and did not want to vomit, and I pulled back also. 

She laid down on the floor and I was on top, kissing, nibbling, mmm boobs.  So nice.   At some point (I don't know when) Master  kicked me between the legs.  That was good too.   He was fondling her as well.  She pushed my head down between her legs.   Ok, a serious bucket list item there.   I started licking, teasing a bit, the way I like it.  She pulled my head down hard and ground against my face.  Ohhhh!  I put a finger inside, kept licking.  She came, and I stopped when she signaled "done".  

There was more fucking, more beating, more sucking.  This little slave was getting pretty tired. There was a stream of talk from the two of them  the entire time: "You hole, you slut, be a good hole....etc".  It was very hot.

Then we went upstairs.  My hands were placed inside leather mitten cuffs and tied to the ceiling.   The real beating began.  Master on the back and Mystique in the front.   Just about everything got used- the single tails, dragon tails, leather paddle, several floggers, canes, it all quickly became a blurr and I went into subspace.  I think they asked me some questions and I mumbled something or other.  My mouth wasn't working right. 
When I collapsed and couldn't stand they untied me, and I sucked Masters cock, again on all fours.   Something entered me from behind.  I thought it was the strap on again, but she said "I'm fucking you with my whip".  I later saw it was a wooden handle.  Felt soooo good.  I was so out of it.   Then Master laid me flat on the floor and fucked me until he came.   They decided I didn't have enough marks, so laid on the heart paddle again to leave some nice heart shapes.   I have a heart on.  :)

Afterward, we cleaned up, I had another bath, and we went out to eat.  I still don't think I have quite recovered.    We must do it again soon. 

A WOW day

This morning Master said I should wear a collar, silk robe, sandals and nothing else.

Mystique arrived and after the hugs all around, Master said I should take her coat. Instead she handed me the things out of the pockets- large carabiners and bandage scissors, after first putting the icy cold metal up against my chest.  Master pulled aside my thin robe.

I put the items on the table and Master ordered espresso and Mystique, coffee. I made both while they went to sit in the living room. I think they were discussing the suspension possibilities of the huge old ceiling beams in there.

When I went back to ask Mystique if she wanted anything in her coffee (all we had was milk or sugar) Master told me to take her shoes back to the kitchen.

The coffee was done, I served it, and he told me I needed to be naked and wearing a leash. I ran upstairs, shedding the robe as I went, and brought the leash back down. I was still wearing panties because I'd asked Master earlier if I could. Dang period, so inconvenient.  Luckily no one here was offended by a little blood.

He had me kneel at his feet after he clipped the leash on my collar, there was some chatting, then we went to look at the basement. 

  Master was saying it would make a pretty good dungeon with a little work. To demonstrate he wrapped the chain around my wrists, pulled them up over my head and pushed me up against the cold, crumbly stone wall. He slapped my tits, asked Mystique if she wanted to do so as well (she did- and flicked- fucking OW!). He put his hand on my throat and said "Time for your party trick. Cum!" Master had been teasing me on and off for the last couple of hours, but not letting me cum, so it was a really big one.

We went back upstairs and I again knelt by his feet as they sat on the couch. Mystique called me over and I went to her feet, still on my knees.  She had rope in her hands so I held up my wrists, thinking that was what she wanted. But it wasn't. Instead she bound my breasts into cupcake shapes (I was thinking it was a pity we didn't have any frosting). They hurt at first, especially when she put clothes pins on as well and wiggled them. Ow, that was smarting quite a bit, even more than the flicking had.    When the clothes pins finally came off the ropes felt pretty good just by themselves.

She told me to lie down on the floor, which I did, and she roped my knees in a bent up position, and tied my hands to them. They both went to work on me with various implements- canes, mostly, but also finger flogger and a wooden spoon- thighs, breasts, cunt, all got some attention. It was sooooo good. They asked me some questions that I don't really remember, but I distinctly remember Master ordering me to call her Mistress.

After who knows how long, Master told me to stand up, then had a bit of a laugh when I looked at my completely roped together arms and legs in consternation. I managed to sit, and straight in front of my face was a huge strap-on. My head was pulled in and I started fellating it. Ok, one more thing off the bucket list (the cupcake breasts-bondage was the other first for me). I wasn't sure I was doing it at all right, wasn't sure how best to give her pleasure that way, but I tried to think what it might be like and do my best. I guess it was ok because she came.   I also came several times, on command. 

Meanwhile Master was tapping my backside with the cane.

She pulled out of my mouth and sent me upstairs for towels and a wet washcloth.

I was ordered to take off my underwear and as Master sat on a chair I got in front of him, over towels, on my hands and knees. I was pinned between the strap on in my cunt and his cock in my mouth. It felt like nothing else has ever felt. It was fantastic being totally filled up and pinned in place that way. (Another bucket list item- check!). I can't quite decide if this was my favorite part of the day, or a little bit later. Anyway, it was better than I could have imagined. Both us ladies came. Women sooo have the advantage in the multiple orgasm department.

Mystique fucked me good and long. When they were done they sent me off to take a bath. I came back and I asked if I should get dressed. Mystique said "Oh, no, we're not done with you yet."

Plans for sharing

I don't have long to wait now, so just a quick note before I have to get ready.  Master has invited dominant friend (a woman) over to play with me today.   I expect I will be serving and then probably tied, beaten and used by her or both of them.   I have nervous butterflies but am also happily excited. 

I just finished painting my toenails, so I'm waiting for them to dry. 

Tuesday, November 6, 2012


I spend a lot of my time wondering.  I don't really get to know things or plan like someone who is not a slave.  Mostly I wonder if/when I'm going to get fucked.  Yeah, I know, it has only been 17 hours now, but still, I can sit and wonder.  And hope.   I wonder if he wants to beat me first, or just a quick fuck.   Asking doesn't do me any good- I've tried that on other days.   I sit here at the lap top looking at the wooden spoon which was used on my ass half an hour ago and then set right beside me, so I'm staring at it.  It's kind of lurking there.  A promise?  A threat?  A casual discard?  I have the feeling he's not thinking about me at all, and I'm completely wrapped up in thinking about him.  When he was done with the spanking he shoo'd me away with a "Now go".   I'm wondering if he is going to come back to it, or if we are just going to go to bed.  

It's kind of like waiting for the election results to come in, except a lot more directly applicable and tactile.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Full of rapey goodness

You know the evening is going well when I've been thrown on the floor, begged him to stop, gotten slapped for leaving off "Master" from my begging, then raped in every hole and turned into a little puddle of submissive goo.  When he got up and left me there on the floor I felt like I was surrounded in a weird fog.  This lasted quite a while, even after I was up and walking around. 

It all started with a "You better get your sorry ass upstairs."

No, before that it started with an episode of Madmen and a rape scene with Christina Hendricks.   He leaned over to me and said "That really made you hot, didn't it?"  I couldn't deny it. 

As much as I want to be a good PC liberal, I still can't deny that it did turn me on.  Both watching and being done.  Of course, on Madmen is it just tv, and for me it is just being a slave.  If that helps at all.  Probably not. 

Sunday, November 4, 2012

A Munch and a Violet Wand

Yesterday we went to our local munch, and the topic was electrical play.

Master had told me that if we went to the munch I WOULD be experiencing the zappy things (violet wand).  I told him I really wasn't interested in that;  I just wanted to go to the munch to see people I don't get to see very often.   You can probably guess how much impact my preferences had on him. 

If you guessed NONE AT ALL you are right.  

So when they asked for volunteers to be zapped he propelled me to the front of the room.   He asked for a zap on his arm as well, since he wanted to know what it was like.  It was just little shocks but I couldn't help flinching away.  It wasn't exactly painful, but it was slightly unpleasant.    Once they put some attachments on it the shocks were milder, then after a few people had had turns with it, he pulled down my pants and undies and shocked my butt with it.   "Don't mind the bruises", he said to the assembled crowd. 
This was kind of funny because in this group bruises are definitely not to be minded, more like expected.   

I'm still pretty nervous about electricity, even after trying it, because I can imagine the shocks could get much  more intense than the little test ones I got.  Turn it up to 11!   Eeek. 

We also got to go out to lunch with a good friend who is also a slave, and we sat in the pillow room of  a Mediterranean/Middle Eastern restaurant.  I cuddled up to Master, and we had a great time eating good food and talking about various things. 

Saturday, November 3, 2012

I should have seen that coming...

So this morning I was feeling all chipper and cheery, as is usual for a Saturday, and when Master woke up and came down I asked if he wanted to make pancakes for breakfast.

"Yes, I sure do.  Watch how I make us pancakes.

Slave, go make pancakes!"

Friday, November 2, 2012

Murphy and his damn Law

This afternoon the kids went to visit their friends and were gone all evening.  We had plans, oh yes.  We were going to leave work right at 5:00, go to the gym, work out, then eat a nice light dinner, and go home and screw like crazed weasels. 

Ha, ha, ha, I can hear you all laughing, or perhaps that is the ghost of Murphy. 

A very, very sick animal came in at the end of the day.  Master did the full work up for it, tried all kinds of things, but it was really too late.  

We left almost 2 hours late.  Starving.   I ate some of my "emergency cheese" from the fridge at work.   He decided to skip dinner and get straight to the fucking, so we did.  It was worth skipping dinner for, worth any amount of waiting.  The willow cane got quite a work out on my ass also.  

We finally had dinner around 8.   Now it's just about bedtime, and I'm really glad it is Friday.

Pork chops and Ruth Reichl

I have to apologize to the sexy Goddess of the kitchen, Ruth Reichl, for doubting her word on the cooking of pork chops.
I did the experiment last night.  One pan of chops I started with medium hot pan, and the other pan was completely cold when I put the chops in.  Amazingly enough they were done at the same time.  Then, at Master's orders, I split two pork chops and gave him half a cold start one and have a hot start one, and he ate them without knowing which was which.  Of course, I had to stand by and watch him eat so I could keep track of them.   He gave his opinion on the one that was most tender, and it was the cold pan start chop. 

So there you go, Science!  to the rescue.   

Thursday, November 1, 2012

A Caning We Will Go...

Oh, we had some rather exciting plans for today.  We were supposed to go to a friend's house and it was all going to be quite kinky and naughty, but she was sick, so we have to wait until next week.  We were all bummed about that.   He says it's ok, it will give him more time to plot with her (she is a Top) about what they are going to do to me. 

 Master didn't let it ruin his fun.  First he got me all roped up, collared and leashed, built a fire,  then we watched the rest of the movie from the other night when I fell asleep.   After that, he watched his Normandy movie, and shortened up the leash so I only had room to bob my head up and down on him. 

The Normandy movie didn't have much left to it, so before long he had me lie on the couch, put my legs up in the air and told me to "Stay". 

He went off upstairs, and I stayed.  My legs started to tremble after a while, but I told them to relax, and stay put, and they did.  He came back down with the rattan cane, and gave me some good whacks.   That part is so sensitive, ok, all the parts are so sensitive if you hit them hard enough. 

He took some pictures: 

He says this couch is the perfect height, and when we buy a new one we are going to have to test them out to make sure they are right.  This could be embarrassing. 

Politics, sex and religion

My Master is of the opinion that the way to foil all these bogus pollsters who are calling us up with phone surveys on a daily basis is to lie like a rug to them.   I have trouble with this.  People ask me questions, I either hang up on them or I give the real answers.

Well, last night I got another call from a "pollster" (most of them are not real polls- they are sneakily try to sway your opinion with their loaded questions).   I started answering questions, and Master came up to me and commanded "Lie to them".    He stuck his hand into my jeans.  I gasped a little.

 I started making up stuff,  wild stories of political conservatism or middle of the roadness.   Why, yes, I'm thinking of voting for Romney; yes I like Paul Ryan (gag).   Ethnicity?  Why, I'm Hispanic (I'm not).  Religion?  Conservative fundamentalist?  No, I'm Wiccan. (I'm not)    I left just enough truth in there to be completely nonsensical.  Sure, I think Obama is doing a good job.  Last election, I voted for Ralph Nadar.  (I didn't) Now I think the country is going to hell. 

His finger was in my cunt, and he commanded me to cum.  I did, as quietly as I could.

From the phone:  "Ehem.  What do you think of Joe Biden?" 

"Oh, I hate him".     "Aaaah, Ow!"  He had pinched a nipple.

"Who will you vote for- Tommy Thompson or Tammy Baldwin?"

I asked Master "Who do we like?"   He said Thompson.

Speaking into the phone again I say:  "My husband says we like Tommy Thompson".

The polling lady laughed.  She sounds Southern, and is probably familiar with a few ladies a little older than me whose politics is dictated by the male head of household. 

He's made me drip right through my jeans now, and makes me cum again.  I don't think I'm all that quiet.  

She thanked me for my participation and I hung up.   Master said he hoped I was having fun since he wasn't going to beat or fuck me at all that night. 

It brings a new meaning to the term phone harassment.  

Just a little update

I'm still doing the weight watchers program, and am down a total of 6 lbs, 4 of which of course were the first week.   I am fitting into...