Tuesday, June 27, 2017

TMI Tuesday: Purpose

1. If happiness was a currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

Sex, intimacy and bdsm.
2. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

I do believe in what I am doing.  I think it has value and purpose.  May not "feeding the hungry" level of importance, but it is important in my life and for my values.
3. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

I would have had kids earlier.
4. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

Doing the right things. I'm not much of a perfectionist. 
5. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?

Newborns don't speak English :). 
Probably something like "Who's a cute little sprog sprout? You are!" 

Bonus: When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

Oh no.  Other that writing a little bit, I don't talk much.  

Monday, June 26, 2017

Cooking and Fucking: A Collaboration

I had such a delightful day yesterday.  It was a nice summer's day here in the north, and it was made even more lovely by what transpired during the day.  Master had invited a friend over to cook with me (and told me I would be serving our friend in any way that he desired, with one limit, which is no anal).

We made a light lunch first, as Dr. Peter showed me how to make dosas.  They were sticking to the pan at first, since I don't have the right pan for them, but he told me about his mother's trick of cooking an egg in the pan first, and after that they were perfect.  Dosas are a type of Indian crepe.  He brought along some sambar (spiced vegetable stew) and coconut chutney to fill them.  

When we had finished eating we went upstairs for some play. 

First Master flogged Dr. Peter, who said he was in dire need of a good flogging, which he always enjoys.  Master had Dr. Peter lean over the antique chest of drawers which was the perfect height for him to balance his elbows.  This was enjoyable for me to watch from the other side of the room.

When they were finished with the scene, Master put on my collar, chain leash and wrist cuffs and they had me kneel on the dark brown wooden chaise longue upholstered with a green brocade. It is narrow so I knew I would have to concentrate on being still.  I can be a wiggler when the painful things are happening!

After a few strong hand spankings, he picked up one of the canes he had brought.  I couldn't see which one, but when it landed across my ass and thighs it felt like fire.  My Master stood in front of me, holding the leash up tight to help keep me still.

Dr. Peter switched to a smoked dragon cane, which hurt just as much as the first one.  It grew harder in intensity, and Master tightened his grip on me.  I didn't fall, but eventually they moved me to a position kneeling on the floor. 

My tender bits between my legs were caned; the combination of pain and flaming pleasure was impossible to resist.  I had soon soaked everything. 

I was thoroughly used, as you can see here:

I was bleeding a little bit, but Master simply handed the leash over to Dr. Peter, telling me I should obey every order I was given.  Master went downstairs.   

Dr. Peter lay back on the bed.  I have to admit I had been thinking about this moment all week, imagining how it was going to go, what he was going to do, what I was going to do.   Above all, I desired to be pleasing.   I think I succeeded.  


After a long while, we went back downstairs. My Master jumped up, saying "My turn".  I was sore, tired and very nearly sated but he is irresistible.  Literally, heh.  He fucked me and paddled me while he fucked me, and talked to Dr. Peter the entire time.  I enjoy that sort of objectification. 
Dr. Peter did most of the cooking of dinner, as I watched intently and picked up all sorts of tips that just reading recipes doesn't give one.

Meanwhile, Master was randomly smacking, molesting and generally being VERY distracting in the kitchen.   

The food, of course, was absolutely delicious. There was curry spiced chicken and squash with onions and dal and a little spice.  None of it was hot hot, but all very flavorful.

  I had made strawberry rhubarb pie in the morning so I had to save some room for that.  

Today I'm sore and worn out, but it was quite the perfect day for me.   


PS. Dr. Peter helped me write this one, so I named it a collaboration.

Friday, June 23, 2017


Last night Master attached the clover clamps to my lower lips and stretched them tight.  He inserted two fingers and began fucking me with them.  It was full of hurting pleasure, and as he did it he told me that he'd like to have another submissive woman here to attach the other set of clamps to her the same way, and then the double ended dildo between us.  

When we are all trussed up like that he would beat us, so we'd be tempted to squirm, but all squirming would lead to more pain from the clamps.

We just need some volunteers...

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Improving a Bad Day

Master had a terrible day yesterday.  He's caught my cold, but he still has to go into work.  Not only that, but he had to go to a meeting after work that lasted until 8:30.  He starts work at 8.  Then on the way home he hit something in the road, a rock or pothole, and wrecked not only the tire but also the rim.   Then he got home and found out our mortgage company messed up the payment I gave them and were calling us a month behind.  So he spent an hour on the phone with them sorting it out.  It is all sorted now, and it was their fault, so that's ok at least.

I had forgotten about his meeting after work and made dinner, put on some make up and a slutty outfit, got myself all worked up and  ready to meet him at the door.  I only remembered to check the messages when he didn't appear at the usual time.  Doh.  So I sat around all evening watching TV.  I took off my outfit and put on my bathrobe.  I figured he would be tired after that long day.  

He wasn't so much tired as keyed up and upset, so at bedtime he gave me a paddling and then used me hard, which was good for both of us.     

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

TMI Tuesday: Shame!

1. Tell us a sexual thing/fantasy would you never want your friends to know you like or have done?

My kinky friends all could have access to my blog if they wanted to see what I'm up to.  I don't really share every fantasy with anyone but my Master.  For my vanilla friends?  Big difference!  I wouldn't really want them to know any of it, from the simple to the extreme. 

2. Has anyone ever found an item of sexy underwear, a sex toy or perhaps a picture on your phone that embarrassed you?

The kids found and played with a riding crop we accidentally left out once.  They said "This would be GREAT for hitting people" and went waving it around.  I said it was for horse back riding,  which I don't do much of now, and I never used a crop when I did, but you never know when you're going to start up again, right?

3. Do you have any fantasies you could never go through with because you think you would feel ashamed?

Nope, whichever ones Master wants me to go through with will happen.   If I'm ashamed that is not a big issue.  It could even be sort of hot to be slightly ashamed.  

4. Have you ever felt shame after a sexual experience?

Yes, I had some feelings of shame when we first started playing with other people.  Even though it was at my Master's orders, I felt a little too slutty about how much I enjoyed various things, and I was kind of ashamed of that.  Now I guess I have embraced my inner slut and it doesn't bother me at all.   My Master really encourages my inner slut!  :)

Bonus:  Share a recent non-sexual moment of shame.

I'm not going to get the bonus- I can't think of anything recent.    

See the other answers at: https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2017/06/19/tmi-tuesday-june-20-2017/

Monday, June 19, 2017

Just Two Little Words

 Master started out Sunday morning by having me cook his breakfast naked, and constantly harassing me as I worked on it. I was in quite a dripping state when he put me on the floor and shoved his cock into my mouth.  He pulled me up a few minutes later and, with a light smack, told me to get back to cooking.

I was fucked up against the wall, doggy style on the floor, and every which way.  There was some heavy paddling too.  All in the kitchen while I was making some sausages.

  After we ate he told me to put the butt plug in and come back to suck his cock.   I did this.  It had been a while since I'd used the plug, but I got it in pretty quickly anyway. 

He took me upstairs after I'd pleasured him with my mouth, and used that mean, nasty vicious tire tread slapper paddle on me.  Then we got in bed and he had me get on top.  He told me to tie his hands to the bed and put the leash on HIS neck.  That was different, but I did as he wanted.  I knelt above his face and played with my cunt inches from his nose, in the way that I know teases him.  I played with his cock and then left it alone just when he was getting most aroused.  I bit him and rode his cock in the backwards position.  I got out the hitachi and had orgasms- some of them (most) waited for his command, but if I could I would just have them rapid fire like without commands.  I was pretty wild and free there for a bit, and I know we both had a really fun time.  

 When he finally came inside me, we collapsed back on the bed side by side. 

"There are just two little words that can get you out of the trouble you're in now."  I knew he was just teasing me.  It helps me come down to earth again, though, back to my normal subservient mindset from being a bit of a toppy little cunt.

What's that?" I asked.

"Happy Father's Day" he said.

"Happy Father's Day", I repeated.

Never being one afraid to state the obvious, I added, smiling, "That's three words".

"I guess you're not getting out of it then," he said, also smiling.  

Then I rolled my head on to his shoulder for closer cuddling.   

Sunday, June 18, 2017


I knew I was in for a rough night when Master put on his black fedora and called me Dolores.  The fact that he was holding a machete didn't help.

He'd been reading my old diaries and wanted to know why, in November of 1988, I had gone to a movie with "Teddy".  I told him I didn't remember any "Teddy".  He put me on my knees, hit me hard as I knelt in front of him.  The machete is dulled at the edges, but as a tool for beating is very painful, with no give at all.  He asked me why I had held hands with this Teddy person at the movie, why my hand had made it's way into Teddy's pants during the movie.  Why I had fucked this other guy when I was supposed to belong to and be faithful to my Master.  

He still called me Dolores. 

 I denied everything.  I sobbed.  I didn't know any Teddy, or go to any movie with anyone.  I couldn't remember anything about 1988, for Christsake.  The knife really hurt though, and he kept hurting me relentlessly until I admitted seeing a movie with Teddy, holding his cock in my hand, letting him fuck me afterward.  I confessed to everything, folding like a napkin until the torture of that heavy knife.

Later on, after he'd fucked me and given me powerful orgasms, I cuddled up to him in bed.  My mind confused by pain, exhaustion, subspace and Nyquil, I asked him timidly,

"There was no Teddy, really, was there?" 

Back from Trip

Tuesday I drove the kids down to Missouri to visit my parents, with my sore back and all still.  The drive went ok, but was beastly hot, 97-99 degrees after a downpour, for 9 hours, with my old van AC that is barely hanging in there.   The air conditioning works fine as long as I'm going along at a good speed, but as soon as the car is idling it starts putting out barely cool air.  I had four dogs in the car so it was impossible to stop and turn the car off. 

Anyway, the trip was as good as can be expected, and I got to see my parents and brother, sister in law and two nieces.  I don't get to see the latter family very often at all, so that was really fun.  One is 3 and the other 9.   The older one is crazy about horses and was signed up for horse riding camp all week.  The rest of us alternately puttered around the farm or went out to eat to try to keep cool.   Heat and being unable to cool down is my nemesis.   I didn't sleep very well and on Thursday I came down with a cold.  On the plus side, my back was finally better.   I wasn't sure if I'd be able to drive back Friday as planned, but left it to be determined by how I felt in the morning.  Master did not want me to drive if I was too sick to be safe. 

Friday morning I woke up sharp at 5:30 without an alarm, and I decided this was my sign to go, since I wanted to be on the road at 6 to avoid traffic driving through St. Louis.   I made some coffee, loaded up the dogs and took off.  The kids would say with their grandparents for a few weeks as they do every summer, first one set and then the other, who don't live far away.

 I put in an audiobook, The Gift of Fear, which was really interesting and made the miles fly by.  It may have been one of the shortest seeming 9 hour drives I have made.  I didn't get to finish it, but I think I'm going to seek out a paper copy so I can finish reading at home.

I got home in the early afternoon and was able to unpack, shower and make dinner before Master got home.  I had cooked him a steak with mushrooms and onions, not something I eat (steak or mushrooms), while I had something else.  It was really good to be home.  



Monday, June 12, 2017

Ever Had This Happen?

I found out I was telling the story all wrong.

It was the 20-something year old story of how we got engaged. The other day we were talking about... I don't remember what... and Master happened to mention a crucial bit of the story that I had completely forgotten, so I'd been telling how he proposed to me all wrong this whole time.  After he mentioned it, the memory came back to me and I knew he was right.  

I feel oddly guilty about this, like I should go back to everyone I told the story to and say, "Actually, it was like this, not what I said before".  I know they probably weren't paying attention that closely and most likely don't even care, but somehow I feel all wrong about it. 

The bit I left out was that before he'd even asked me to marry him we were at a big party at school and he just started introducing me to everyone as his fiancee.  I think I just accepted it like "Of course I am."   Later on he actually asked me, with a ring and everything, and that was the part that I remember.   

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Feeling Terrible

Once again my back is killing me.  I don't know what I did to it, but bending over to unload the dishwasher it went out and now I'm aching constantly.  There is no position that feels good for more than a few minutes and any movement also hurts.  I hate this so much. 

I woke up at 5 am this morning feeling like I was about to die of the heat and pain.  It was 81 in the house (at 5 am!).

Thankfully, I was able to turn on the AC, and after a bit of sitting on a vent I thought I might live after all.   In a few days I'm going to see my parents in Missouri, and they have no air conditioning.  I don't think I will survive at all. 

Master and I did have fun yesterday, despite my back.  We went to a munch held at someone's home, and played "Kinky Feud" which is like Family Feud with all kinky questions.  It was really fun.  Then we came home and I made dinner early.  After we ate Master fucked me quickly and I had the first orgasms I've had since Wednesday, which was a big relief. 

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Sometimes a Miracle

For you who are parents, the occasion that both kids make plans out of the house on their own at the same time is like a minor miracle, isn't it? 

Yesterday was our oldest kid's 16th birthday, and he wanted to celebrate by going to see Wonder Woman with "friends" who actually turned out to be one girl.  He's very shy about admitting to mom and dad that he likes a girl or wants to do anything with her, so I'm trying not to make a big deal about it, they are just friends, but I did feel like I needed to know who he was going with, as part of my parental obligations.  

The younger kid planned a sleep over with his best friend for the last day of school.

So I dropped both kids off before Master got home, and I sent him a message that I was doing that.  When I got back home he was there and was ready for me to serve him dinner.  After he'd eaten, I asked if he wanted to watch a show on TV or something.

"Nope," he said, "I want to fuck you."  My heart went flippity flop because I was hoping for but not really expecting that.

We went upstairs and he grabbed me, spanked me and kissed me.  He wanted to know why I wasn't naked yet. He stripped off my shirt.  I struggled out of my shorts.  He told me it was going to be a quick one and he sent me ahead to wait. When he came into the bedroom a few minutes later he took out a cane as I knelt on the floor.  After using that on me, he flogged me and then took me from behind.  I was still in the same place, head down, ass up on the floor.  The first thrust was hard and painful and I yelped and jumped a little.  A few more and I was able to relax to receive him.

He gave me half a dozen orgasms with the magic wand, and then he flipped me over and came inside me.  

It was a good evening!


Tuesday, June 6, 2017


Master asked me if I wanted to play a fun new game today. I was on my knees at the time, my mouth wrapped around his cock.

"Ok" I mumbled around it.

"What was that? Ok?? What do you say?"

I corrected myself "Yes, Master."

He told me my new command to orgasm for now was going to be "shiny".   I just had to believe it would work, and it would.  

"Yes, Master", I repeated.

He had already beaten me hard with the paddle and was still using the belt on me as I was on my knees in front of him.  On top of my already bruised and welted ass from Saturday's activities, this was quite painful.  I had squirted all over the floor, and while I was cleaning it up, he kicked me in the ass and cunt. 

I kept sucking.  He kept hitting me with the belt.  Then he began to sing:


This song!   The first few times the word came up he hummed through it.  I grimaced, licked my lips, and my cunt clenched a little each time.  But I didn't come yet.  When he finally said the word I convulsed and squirted again.

He took me to bed.

He began making up new words for the tune- I can't remember all of them now but they were much naughtier than the original version.  One of them was "Now it's time to beat your hiney".

TMI Tuesday. You have questions? I have answers.

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

Mystique would be the first person I'd invite.  I have a few other friends I'd love to have over more often.  The friends that visited over the weekend are two of them.
2. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

We'd be in Paris.  There would be morning sex, also bondage and spankings.  Then we would get some eclairs and coffee at a bakery and cafe, stroll around, see some sights, then more hot fucking at night.  And food, all the French food.
3. How much do you like your personality?
(pick just one)

a. A lot.
b. A little.
c. It needs work.
d. I am annoying sometimes.
e. I am difficult, and people have told me so.

Definitely d. Or a.  I don't know.  I'm all right, I guess.
4. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

I think the body.  Who cares if I'm a little doddery in the mind?
5. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any ability, what would it be?

I want the ability to cure cancer.
Bonus: How do you think you will die?

The way I picture it, we are a couple of octogenarians and we decide to take a blimp ride. Wave good bye to the kids and grandkids. Sail peacefully over the countryside. Why a blimp? Well, by that time blimp rides have become the new hot thing. We are sailing along and all of a sudden there is panic in the cabin! Flames! We're going down! I hope there's no hell! Ahhhhaaaaaggggggg.....

Or, maybe we are tottering through the countryside on our walkers. Or toodling along in our scooters. What's that in the sky? How cool, a blimp! Wait, why is it on fire??? It's getting closer, no time to run.....ahhhhhh sweet merciful death angels.... good bye cruel world...

See more answers at:  https://tmituesdayblog.wordpress.com/2017/06/05/tmi-tuesday-june-6-2017/

Monday, June 5, 2017

Swap and Whipping

This weekend we had some dear friends come visit us and had a fantastic time visiting with them.  They are also a M/s couple, though their relationship works differently than ours in some ways (don't they all?), they are also CNC.  They are mentioned here as Travis and Wolfmoon.

On Saturday afternoon the kids went to see a movie and we were able to play. We swapped, and  I got a good whipping.  :) It hurt, but I loved it.  

How my back looked right after:
 How it looks today:

Master had a long scene/playtime with her, which I watched from about halfway through, or so.  It looked really fun.

They spent the night and in the morning we made breakfast together.  We spent a lot of time sitting out in the yard, chatting and enjoying the weather, and playing with the puppy.  Then we went down to the river and walked.  It was just a gorgeous day!

Sunday, June 4, 2017

My New Baby

This is my new baby!  She is using up almost all my time and energy, but boy is she a fun little puppy with a huge attitude. A spitfire, for sure, and smart.

Friday, June 2, 2017

Incompatibilities or Differences?

Some differences are small, but some are major and can lead to people deciding they are incompatible.  How does your relationship look? What differences are there? What incompatibilities can be overcome and how?

We are similar in a lot of ways: background, politics, sense of humor, activity levels

 *Inequalities of sexual tastes/sex drive?*
Depends what year you are talking about.  We both have changed a lot.

    *Different musical tastes?*
We started out pretty similar, in that I adopted his tastes completely.  Then I started listening to country music and he hates it.  So I just listen when he's not around. 

    *Different sleeping habits?*

I'm more of a morning person than he is, but he has to get up early for work, so we are only different on weekends, and it is really no big deal.  If he wanted me to lie in bed until he was ready to get up I'd have a hard time, but he doesn't.

    *Different parenting styles?*

If it were just me there would have been a lot less video games, but eh, not a big deal also.

We are similar in a lot of ways: background, politics, sense of humor, activity levels.

 *Inequalities of sexual tastes/sex drive?*

Depends what year you are talking about.  We both have changed a lot.  Right now I'm a bit higher, but in past years he was much more driven than me and I was quite blase toward sex.  We have lucked out in finding some heavy overlap in what sorts of kinky stuff we like to do.  It's not 100%, but he's the Master, so we do what he wants.  Sometimes he lets me play with others, also, so I can do the few things that he isn't super into.

    *Living style (one likes TV on, the other hates background noise; one likes minimalist, the other is a hoarder; one likes country, the other is a city girl; one likes cats and the other doesn't trust cats etc)*

My Master doesn't really care where he lives.  Everything else is more important to him (like his job), so he let me pick a house in the country so I could have sheep and more dogs.

    *Different hobbies and interests? (one likes hunting and ones likes shopping, one likes clubbing and one likes gardening, or one has a narrow interest the other doesn't share)*

We share some hobbies, but I do a lot of dog training stuff and he doesn't.  I'm the trainer and he's the vet, so it really is complementary.  Although he became a vet after we were together, in part because I was planning on getting a lot of animals.  He likes computer games and I don't much, although I did try one of his.

    *Physical appearance (one wants long hair and the other short etc, one is a nail biter and the other likes long nails, one likes clean-shaven while the other prefers not to shave)?*

It wouldn't matter if we had different preferences, because I follow his.

*2. Do you tolerate the incompatibilities with your partner, and if so is it for them, or because of your dynamic that you are willing to do so?*

I think we are compatible because none of the differences we have are a big deal or a problem for us. 

*3. Do you compromise on your incompatibilities, for example leaving certain things unregulated?*

If it is important to him, then he gets his way. If is isn't, then I may have some room to do what I want.

*4. Do you try to ignore your incompatibilities and focus on areas of compatibility?*

He finds my differences interesting.  I don't think we need to be exactly alike to be compatible. If we were too much alike, then we wouldn't be having any M/s or D/s relationship because we'd both want the D/M or the s side. 

*5. Or do your incompatibilities cause arguments which make it hard to keep your dynamic/relationship healthy?*

No, we don't argue about any of this.  He's the Master, so he gets what he wants.

*6. What position do you take: do you generally advise that M/s or D/s couples with incompatibilities should stay together and fulfill their promises/commitment to each other ("Here, I do what I agreed to do and we do everything His/Her way"), or in your experience is perfect or key-area compatibility essential to make it work ("Sounds like you two are simply incompatible")?*

It really depends on the issue.  It is possible to get over a lot of issues if you really want to be together.  If the relationship is on the rocks anyway, all the issues are magnified.  Solutions have to be tailored to the people involved, which means THEY have to work it out

Just a little update

I'm still doing the weight watchers program, and am down a total of 6 lbs, 4 of which of course were the first week.   I am fitting into...