Master and I have been having ongoing talks about a certain topic for the past few weeks.
It is my dogs/sheep/sheepherding/dog trialing hobby.
I think I have mentioned this a few times in passing, but not gone into any in-depth discussion.
For the past almost 20 years I have this hobby, really an obsession, of training dogs for sheepdog trials.
Evidently I have trouble holding more than one obsession in mind at a time, because ever since I became a slave and we got involved in BDSM I have been cutting back on the dog activities. But animals are not something you can put down like basket making or knitting. Even when you lose the driving obsession to compete with them, which takes considerable expenditures of time, energy and money, the dogs are still there demanding care, attention and training (a high energy working breed just does not do well if they have to find their own entertainment).
Anyway, other than putting a restriction on how much I could spend a few years ago, he hadn't discouraged me at all. There is no actual reason I can't both be a slave and continue to train and trial dogs. So we talked about why I wasn't training anymore, and why I hadn't been to any trials except as a judge in a very long time. Some main reasons came out :
1. Money- I didn't want to spend it on things that did not directly benefit us/our time together/him.
2. Time- I didn't want to be away from him for several or many weekends a year. When I was actively campaigning for Stockdog Finals- one has to earn points to get in- this took A LOT of time and money, in travel, entry fees and hotels. There really are no trials that are local to us.
3. Relative importance- When I have things I HAVE to do, according to his rules, I, of course, put priority on those. The training gets pushed off and just not done, because I don't really want to do it, and I don't have to do it, so I don't. I do have the time; I just don't have the motivation.
He told me that he didn't want me to give up my hobby for him, or for any of those reasons. We may not have the money for me to trial a lot right now, but I can always train, and then I'd be able to trial if we do have more money later.
I told him about my problems with self motivation, and he said he'd consider making out a schedule, which I would then be required to follow.
A few days later, after he'd had a chance to consider what he wanted, he wrote down a schedule for me, putting down some extra chores that he wants done weekly, as well as days that are marked for exercise (for me) and for herding with the dogs.
I'm good at following orders :), so I have been sticking to his schedule since then. Thursday was the holiday, so he told me to move my exercise day to Friday instead this week.
If for any reason I can't follow it I have to email or call him and let him know right away (deep snow or ice might be a reason).
I have found that I still do enjoy training the dogs, even though sometimes getting started involves an act of will. Once I get out there I have a good time. The dogs love it too. I enjoy it even more knowing that Master requires it, that it is not just some whim of mine that may be taking away from the time I devote to things he wants me to do. I just feel better all around knowing that it IS something he wants me to do, and he wants it enough that he has made it mandatory.
Saturday, November 30, 2013
Friday, November 29, 2013
Happy Thanksgivukkah!
I hope you had a lovely day yesterday, whether you are celebrating Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, both, or nothing at all.
We are not particularly religious, but our good friends are Jewish, so we celebrated both holidays with them last night, with lots of turkey, stuffing, pie and other traditional Thanksgiving fare, along with lighting of the Menorahs at sunset, and gelt and presents for the kids.
Other than my having a stomach ache all day and not really being able to eat comfortably (I ate as much as I could anyway), we had a great time. I am so thankful for my friends, and spent yesterday considering how rich they make my life.
These friends are vanilla, and people often ask how does a Master/slave couple behave at vanilla occasions. I suppose if someone has only porn and imagination to rely on, it must seem like we'd look totally out of place. But for anyone that has been in a power exchange relationship as a part of full time life, it becomes obvious that the way we behave is totally natural and unexceptional.
He tells me what time we go, and what time we leave. I asked him for approval on the outfit I was planning to wear.
He gets his own plate of food (buffet style dinner) because he prefers to chose the dishes and amounts himself. Master poured the wine we had brought for everyone at the table also. No real reason, he just did it.
I served him coffee, and put sugar in it for him. When he got up to help clear things I offered to take them for him. He smiled at me and said to our host "I like this method of clearing things", as I took them away.
I'm grateful for having the world's best Master, and for how close we are, for the love and the memories, and the fantastic sex we share.
I'm thankful for my children, and their good health, for my parents and their endless love and support.
I'm also thankful to my blog readers, who make me feel like I'm not writing into a vacuum here, or to myself, but actually writing to friends out there who are supportive of, and interested in, my journeys.
Wishing you and yours the best on this day of mad shopping craziness!
Speaking of which, we don't do the whole Black Friday thing. I'm not into shopping with crowds, and he's basically forbidden the purchase of anything that is not an emergency today.
We are not particularly religious, but our good friends are Jewish, so we celebrated both holidays with them last night, with lots of turkey, stuffing, pie and other traditional Thanksgiving fare, along with lighting of the Menorahs at sunset, and gelt and presents for the kids.
Other than my having a stomach ache all day and not really being able to eat comfortably (I ate as much as I could anyway), we had a great time. I am so thankful for my friends, and spent yesterday considering how rich they make my life.
These friends are vanilla, and people often ask how does a Master/slave couple behave at vanilla occasions. I suppose if someone has only porn and imagination to rely on, it must seem like we'd look totally out of place. But for anyone that has been in a power exchange relationship as a part of full time life, it becomes obvious that the way we behave is totally natural and unexceptional.
He tells me what time we go, and what time we leave. I asked him for approval on the outfit I was planning to wear.
He gets his own plate of food (buffet style dinner) because he prefers to chose the dishes and amounts himself. Master poured the wine we had brought for everyone at the table also. No real reason, he just did it.
I served him coffee, and put sugar in it for him. When he got up to help clear things I offered to take them for him. He smiled at me and said to our host "I like this method of clearing things", as I took them away.
I'm grateful for having the world's best Master, and for how close we are, for the love and the memories, and the fantastic sex we share.
I'm thankful for my children, and their good health, for my parents and their endless love and support.
I'm also thankful to my blog readers, who make me feel like I'm not writing into a vacuum here, or to myself, but actually writing to friends out there who are supportive of, and interested in, my journeys.
Wishing you and yours the best on this day of mad shopping craziness!
Speaking of which, we don't do the whole Black Friday thing. I'm not into shopping with crowds, and he's basically forbidden the purchase of anything that is not an emergency today.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Monday Play/ Spanish Lessons
Monday, Master's day off, was a beautiful day, cold outside and just perfect for staying inside and watching movies, with no kids around to hear should I get a little, um, noisy.
We watched for a while, then he let me go get my collar, cuffs and leash. He had me put the collar and leash on and sit beside him on the couch, leash pulled tight across his lap. There are few things in my life that equal that feeling. It's almost embarrassing how much I love it.
Instead of putting the ankle cuff on me, he began to beat my ass with one, then with both of them. I held still as long as I could, lying across his lap, then began to wiggle and squirm.
"Hold still, slave, or I will beat you with the buckle end".
That sounded much worse. I held still.
He then led me to the computer and had me sucking his cock for a good long time, stopping or slowing me when he'd get close. He had a crop in his hand and was using it for "encouragement". Once he asked me if my jaw was getting tired, and amazingly enough it was not, though my knees were aching and I kept switching positions to relieve that strain (hardwood floors not so good for kneeling).
Later, upstairs, he took me, and then when he was done he beat me again with the crop so long (and I remember asking for more- crazy masochist!) that I sat uncomfortably all the rest of the day. The hot shower afterward was very stingy!
In the morning, I thought perhaps a very sore pussy from the cropping it received would prevent more horniness. Not so! But he had to leave for work right away, very early.
------------------------------
Spanish Lessons
Later on that evening, we were helping our son with his first year Spanish practice, and he's working on conjugating llevar (to wear).
We watched for a while, then he let me go get my collar, cuffs and leash. He had me put the collar and leash on and sit beside him on the couch, leash pulled tight across his lap. There are few things in my life that equal that feeling. It's almost embarrassing how much I love it.
Instead of putting the ankle cuff on me, he began to beat my ass with one, then with both of them. I held still as long as I could, lying across his lap, then began to wiggle and squirm.
"Hold still, slave, or I will beat you with the buckle end".
That sounded much worse. I held still.
He then led me to the computer and had me sucking his cock for a good long time, stopping or slowing me when he'd get close. He had a crop in his hand and was using it for "encouragement". Once he asked me if my jaw was getting tired, and amazingly enough it was not, though my knees were aching and I kept switching positions to relieve that strain (hardwood floors not so good for kneeling).
Later, upstairs, he took me, and then when he was done he beat me again with the crop so long (and I remember asking for more- crazy masochist!) that I sat uncomfortably all the rest of the day. The hot shower afterward was very stingy!
In the morning, I thought perhaps a very sore pussy from the cropping it received would prevent more horniness. Not so! But he had to leave for work right away, very early.
------------------------------
Spanish Lessons
Later on that evening, we were helping our son with his first year Spanish practice, and he's working on conjugating llevar (to wear).
I danced around the room with my hat, saying:
"Yo llevo un sombrero."
I gave the hat to Master:
"Tu llevas un sombrero", I said.
He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.
"That would be "usted" to you, chiquita", he said.
"Erm, yes, of course. Usted llevas un sombrero".
How handy of Spanish to have a formal/respectful way of saying he wears a hat.
"Yo llevo un sombrero."
I gave the hat to Master:
"Tu llevas un sombrero", I said.
He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.
"That would be "usted" to you, chiquita", he said.
"Erm, yes, of course. Usted llevas un sombrero".
How handy of Spanish to have a formal/respectful way of saying he wears a hat.
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Oh No, He Did Not Just Do That!
I asked to be beaten last night, since it had been all of... um...three days since the last time. Lots of sex, humiliation, slapping, and nipple pinching fun since then, but no just out-and-out beatings since Wednesday.
Yes, I realize that is not a long time, but... what can I say? The more the better? I have no excuses, actually, and I'm not even sure why I feel guilty about it. I asked if he would and he said "Maybe, we'll see". Which means, in Master-language... "Maybe, we'll see."
I tried hard not to expect anything, as my conscious practice of having no expectations has proven to give my mind more peace than getting all ramped up and expectant beforehand.
We watched episode one of the first season of Breaking Bad first, which was really good. We've watched some of the later ones, but never the whole thing in order. I enjoy the humor, and the general wrongness of the whole situation.
After it was over, he started with a boffer sword, and whacking my butt. It's not exactly painful, even to be hit hard, with an insulation foam/duct tape wrapped pvc pipe, but it does have that deeply thuddy, erotically pleasant, ouchy feeling as he hits the same spot repeatedly.
He made me wait in our room for quite a while then. First I did my yoga stretching exercises. Then I knelt in position for a while. Then some more stretching. More kneeling. When I heard him approaching I got properly into position. I don't mind waiting, even though sometimes I complain on here about it. It gets me into a quiet and submissive mindset. It is a ritual that I enjoy, and I'd actually be really upset if I had to give up this little ritual more than just occasionally. Very rarely he tells me not to wait but to get straight into bed. I'd prefer to wait for him though, unless I'm really sick and just want sleep.
When he came in he ordered me to lie on the floor and he gave me a lovely long and painful caning. I was quite a bit floaty when he went and got something from his dresser. He said something about carving his initials in my ass, and I mumbled "Yes Master". Sure, his initials sounded wonderful at that moment.
He ran something cold, sharp and ouchy across tender spots on my butt. I didn't really think he was going to cut me, but the area was so sore already that it hurt. Then he pressed it up against my cunt lips. I stayed soooo still. I whimpered. I was really scared now.
I had my eyes closed tight the whole time, until he told me to roll over on my back. I did so, trying to get a peek at what was in his hand, but he kept it hidden. I closed my eyes again and felt the sharp metal at my throat. He told me to be very still because he wanted to rape me at knife point.
Oh god.
I was as still as could be.
I whimpered in fear. What if it slipped? What if he didn't mean to cut me but did? Even when I opened my eyes I could not see what was in his hand because it was hidden by his hand and arm, and my inability to look down at my own neck without moving a muscle. I just felt cold sharp metal on my neck. It spurred my arousal all the more.
After a long time of him enjoying my fear, and the fucking, he showed me what was in his hand. A Leatherman tool with only the pliers out. Raped at pliers point! How utterly ridiculous it seemed then and I laughed. I pointed out the wire cutters on the tool and said how they could easily take off a nipple.
Leatherman Multi Tool
Yes, I realize that is not a long time, but... what can I say? The more the better? I have no excuses, actually, and I'm not even sure why I feel guilty about it. I asked if he would and he said "Maybe, we'll see". Which means, in Master-language... "Maybe, we'll see."
I tried hard not to expect anything, as my conscious practice of having no expectations has proven to give my mind more peace than getting all ramped up and expectant beforehand.
We watched episode one of the first season of Breaking Bad first, which was really good. We've watched some of the later ones, but never the whole thing in order. I enjoy the humor, and the general wrongness of the whole situation.
After it was over, he started with a boffer sword, and whacking my butt. It's not exactly painful, even to be hit hard, with an insulation foam/duct tape wrapped pvc pipe, but it does have that deeply thuddy, erotically pleasant, ouchy feeling as he hits the same spot repeatedly.
He made me wait in our room for quite a while then. First I did my yoga stretching exercises. Then I knelt in position for a while. Then some more stretching. More kneeling. When I heard him approaching I got properly into position. I don't mind waiting, even though sometimes I complain on here about it. It gets me into a quiet and submissive mindset. It is a ritual that I enjoy, and I'd actually be really upset if I had to give up this little ritual more than just occasionally. Very rarely he tells me not to wait but to get straight into bed. I'd prefer to wait for him though, unless I'm really sick and just want sleep.
When he came in he ordered me to lie on the floor and he gave me a lovely long and painful caning. I was quite a bit floaty when he went and got something from his dresser. He said something about carving his initials in my ass, and I mumbled "Yes Master". Sure, his initials sounded wonderful at that moment.
He ran something cold, sharp and ouchy across tender spots on my butt. I didn't really think he was going to cut me, but the area was so sore already that it hurt. Then he pressed it up against my cunt lips. I stayed soooo still. I whimpered. I was really scared now.
I had my eyes closed tight the whole time, until he told me to roll over on my back. I did so, trying to get a peek at what was in his hand, but he kept it hidden. I closed my eyes again and felt the sharp metal at my throat. He told me to be very still because he wanted to rape me at knife point.
Oh god.
I was as still as could be.
I whimpered in fear. What if it slipped? What if he didn't mean to cut me but did? Even when I opened my eyes I could not see what was in his hand because it was hidden by his hand and arm, and my inability to look down at my own neck without moving a muscle. I just felt cold sharp metal on my neck. It spurred my arousal all the more.
After a long time of him enjoying my fear, and the fucking, he showed me what was in his hand. A Leatherman tool with only the pliers out. Raped at pliers point! How utterly ridiculous it seemed then and I laughed. I pointed out the wire cutters on the tool and said how they could easily take off a nipple.
Leatherman Multi Tool
Saturday, November 23, 2013
His
He said he wanted me upstairs, so I made haste to get up there. As soon as the door was locked he told me to kneel and show my tits.
"Now suck".
I took his cock in my mouth, at first sensually and then tightening my mouth gradually around his shaft. He held my head tight and thrust in and out at an increasing pace, going right down into my throat and making me cough and gag. When he thrust down hard enough to block both throat and airway I couldn't get a breath in at all. He stayed right there. That was when my hands started flapping and he told me to come. The lack of air makes it doubly intense for me and my hands flapped harder. He let me breathe again. I'm his, always his. I feel it down to my toes, only here for his pleasure. Part of his pleasure is to control my orgasms, to send me into lost in pleasure at his whim, any time or any place. With his cock in my throat. At the breakfast table. Anywhere.
He pushed me down on the floor, lifted my skirt up over my hips and took me with one thrust. So tight. He praised my hole. After he had come he stood up and told me to roll over.
He placed his foot on my neck. Pressed down. Pressed a little more. Not enough to hurt, but enough that I definitely felt that another few pounds of pressure and I'd be in trouble. My eyes began to roll and my brain began to fall into space. My fingers clenched into the carpet.
"You're mine."
"Now suck".
I took his cock in my mouth, at first sensually and then tightening my mouth gradually around his shaft. He held my head tight and thrust in and out at an increasing pace, going right down into my throat and making me cough and gag. When he thrust down hard enough to block both throat and airway I couldn't get a breath in at all. He stayed right there. That was when my hands started flapping and he told me to come. The lack of air makes it doubly intense for me and my hands flapped harder. He let me breathe again. I'm his, always his. I feel it down to my toes, only here for his pleasure. Part of his pleasure is to control my orgasms, to send me into lost in pleasure at his whim, any time or any place. With his cock in my throat. At the breakfast table. Anywhere.
He pushed me down on the floor, lifted my skirt up over my hips and took me with one thrust. So tight. He praised my hole. After he had come he stood up and told me to roll over.
He placed his foot on my neck. Pressed down. Pressed a little more. Not enough to hurt, but enough that I definitely felt that another few pounds of pressure and I'd be in trouble. My eyes began to roll and my brain began to fall into space. My fingers clenched into the carpet.
"You're mine."
Thursday, November 21, 2013
An Interlude
He catches me in the kitchen, at the sink. No one is around. He pulls my hair back, then shoves me down, bent over the sink full of dirty dishes on which I was working. My hands grip the edge of the sink and my pussy clenches in anticipation. He's yanked down my jeans without even bothering to unbutton them, and slides a finger under my panties, up to my cunt. It opens for him, and as he taps it, starts to form wetness there. He roughly jerks the panties and jeans down farther now, leaving me to stretch toward him and moan at the absence of his touch.
He is fumbling with his belt now, then his button and zipper. His leg between mine then, kicking my legs further apart to allow his whole hand between them. He cups my cunt in his hand a moment, feeling the warmth, the need and desire for him. Then he gives it a sharp slap and I am on the edge of coming, but he doesn't give the command. Instead he pushes my head further down and plunges his cock into my drenched hole. A brief interlude, that's all, and he decides to wait for another time. Pulling out, he leaves my cunt aching for cock, aching to be filled again. I feel as if I have become just that hole. Just that needy, very greedy hole.
His hole.
He is fumbling with his belt now, then his button and zipper. His leg between mine then, kicking my legs further apart to allow his whole hand between them. He cups my cunt in his hand a moment, feeling the warmth, the need and desire for him. Then he gives it a sharp slap and I am on the edge of coming, but he doesn't give the command. Instead he pushes my head further down and plunges his cock into my drenched hole. A brief interlude, that's all, and he decides to wait for another time. Pulling out, he leaves my cunt aching for cock, aching to be filled again. I feel as if I have become just that hole. Just that needy, very greedy hole.
His hole.
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Surprise!
Master surprised me last night by coming home on a night that he usually stays at our friend's place, closer to work. But he got done early and just really wanted to be home.
When he called and said he was coming I was glad I had showered/shaved and had cleaned the house for most of the day. :) Not that I usually skimp on those things, but, meh, when one doesn't go anywhere or see anyone, sometimes it is easy to skip the things that are not essential for hermits to do. I was wearing jeans and and old sweatshirt, though, so when he was inbound I changed into a skirt, a different top and put on some make up.
I heard him pull in the driveway (the dog warning system works well) and I started reheating his dinner, so when he walked in the door it was all set. Then I rubbed his back as he ate, and rubbed it some more as he played video games. He has been sore again, and this was an order, besides being something I was happy to do.
After the kids were in bed we waited a while until they were actually asleep, then he took me upstairs and caned the heck out of me, front and back. I was a whimpering and sobbing a bit by the time he stopped.
He rolled on his back and told me to kiss him. I struggled to roll over as well and get up on my elbows, fogged and whirly as I was from the caning, then made my way to him and kissed him lightly on the lips.
"What the fuck is that?" he said.
"Umm, you wanted the kisses a couple feet lower?" I blinked at him.
He just rolled his eyes at me. Is that allowed? I'm pretty sure that is not in the Master manual.
I unbuckled his belt and kissed as required. He beat my ass with the cane at the same time, making it hard to concentrate. When I lose concentration too much it gets worse on the ass end, so I did the best I could.
Then there was fucking, and face slapping, and more caning, and lots more fucking... it was just a great time all around.
Happy surprise indeed for me!
This morning he got up at 5, and I was up shortly after him to make his breakfast and serve his tea, and happy to do it, smiling like Snow White after the seven dwarves all banged her!
I haven't looked to see if there were new marks this morning, but my ass, thighs and back were pretty well bruised and whip-striped already from Saturday.
When he called and said he was coming I was glad I had showered/shaved and had cleaned the house for most of the day. :) Not that I usually skimp on those things, but, meh, when one doesn't go anywhere or see anyone, sometimes it is easy to skip the things that are not essential for hermits to do. I was wearing jeans and and old sweatshirt, though, so when he was inbound I changed into a skirt, a different top and put on some make up.
I heard him pull in the driveway (the dog warning system works well) and I started reheating his dinner, so when he walked in the door it was all set. Then I rubbed his back as he ate, and rubbed it some more as he played video games. He has been sore again, and this was an order, besides being something I was happy to do.
After the kids were in bed we waited a while until they were actually asleep, then he took me upstairs and caned the heck out of me, front and back. I was a whimpering and sobbing a bit by the time he stopped.
He rolled on his back and told me to kiss him. I struggled to roll over as well and get up on my elbows, fogged and whirly as I was from the caning, then made my way to him and kissed him lightly on the lips.
"What the fuck is that?" he said.
"Umm, you wanted the kisses a couple feet lower?" I blinked at him.
He just rolled his eyes at me. Is that allowed? I'm pretty sure that is not in the Master manual.
I unbuckled his belt and kissed as required. He beat my ass with the cane at the same time, making it hard to concentrate. When I lose concentration too much it gets worse on the ass end, so I did the best I could.
Then there was fucking, and face slapping, and more caning, and lots more fucking... it was just a great time all around.
Happy surprise indeed for me!
This morning he got up at 5, and I was up shortly after him to make his breakfast and serve his tea, and happy to do it, smiling like Snow White after the seven dwarves all banged her!
I haven't looked to see if there were new marks this morning, but my ass, thighs and back were pretty well bruised and whip-striped already from Saturday.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)