Monday, October 24, 2016

After Feelings

Feelings after giving a blowjob or quickie that leaves me feeling unbearably turned on still with no relief in sight:

1. Happiness! The first thing I feel is happiness at having pleased my Master.  There is a bit of pride there too.  I'm so happy to have served him well.  He's pleased with me.

2. Sadness.  Then I feel sad.  That's it for me then for the day or two. No more sex.  No beatings.  Sadness.  Also extreme horniness and frustration. And more sadness.

3. Guilt.  Then I feel guilty for being sad.  What kind of slave are you?  You suck at this (not in a good way).  What kind of bad slave feels sad when she doesn't get enough fucking?  (This one).  I am never going to get this being a slave thing right.

4. Peaceful.  I come to grips with my sadness, my happiness, my pride, and shove my guilt away.   I find my peaceful, patient mind.  

5.  Happiness.  I DID serve my Master and make him happy, and that is good enough. 

Why does this have to be so damn complicated? 

3 comments:

  1. It's those conversations we have with ourselves..happens to me all the time. But overall my opinion...you usually nail this slavery thing..
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
  2. I always got the impression that you were having sex like twice a day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha, nope. Only on exceptional days. That's just how often I WANT to have sex.

      Delete

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