Orgasms and You

This was in response to some questions in a Fetlife group, and I'm going to cheat and repost it as a blog, slightly altered because I can. 

Is your satisfaction dependent on orgasm?  How are orgasms handled in your relationship?

 Orgasms are fun but not the whole point of an experience with Master.

 I can masturbate every day (and I do, because it is allowed) but that is just not the same, and I think most of us would agree, it is not terribly fulfilling.  It's not connection. It is a release.

Without him, without all the physical, mental, and emotional stuff that he does, and the things I do to him, and seeing his responses, his pleasure, just the orgasm alone is a few seconds of pleasure without the massively fulfilling experience that sex and play with him is for me. Without him, I will have one orgasm in less than two minutes (thank you Mr. Hitachi!) and be done. With him, hours and hours seem too short. Where did the time go?

His view on orgasms is as a power trip of mental control (and I love him having that control over my mind as much as he does). He put mine on command, so he can give the command whenever he likes, and it pleases him to have that power over me (I love that grin that he gets!).  Even in a store. Or while I'm on the phone.  Anytime.

For a while after conditioning I couldn't have them at all when not commanded, but he made me work at it until I could masturbate alone again and come, because he wanted me still to be able to do that. But if he's with me I will VERY rarely orgasm without being told. Even with Mr. Hitachi on high and held down on me hard for very long periods I will wait and wait and wait and wait until he tells me I can come.

Interestingly, to me, when someone else is playing with me and they don't give me the command to come, either because they don't want to or they don't know they can, I will be able to wait for a long time, unless they are giving me certain types of pain, and then I will come anyway, without being told or being able to control it. It happens in a sudden shock. The most memorable for me was the first time it happened, when I received a couple hard whip strikes a few inches above my cunt and then, woops, paingasm all over the place.  Puddle on the cross!

 That accidental orgasm happens most often with other people, because my Master has more of a tendency to give me too many orgasms than none at all, and then it doesn't build up and release unexpectedly like that. 
I haven't experienced denial for more than a few days, since he's not into that.

If you would like to comment on your own experiences, or have questions, I'd love to hear from you.