My Master had an amazing, intense scene with someone else Saturday night, and he came out of it with a tremendous need to fuck. Me. Violently.
It had to be in our tent, away from everyone. He practically dragged me there and I could feel the waves of sex energy pouring out of him. I stopped to do something in the campsite and he barked at me "In the tent! Now!" I hopped into the tent like I was snake bitten.
He came in and threw me to the mattress. He pushed energy into me violently as I struggled under him. His expression was fierce, but he didn't scare me. I wanted it. I wanted him violent. I wanted to be taken.
I struggled against him, fighting his body and pushing at him with my hands, but at the same time I was drinking up the energy he threw at me like one parched. I sent energy back to him, first fire and then the surrender of a trapped prey. It inflamed him more and he pounded me with his hands and his cock. My struggles became more feeble as I surrendered and embraced everything he did, the punches to the chest and the thrusting against my bruised asshole when he flipped me over. I came around him multiple times before he orgasmed and collapsed, exhausted.
Something he told me during all this made me want to cry. I held back the tears. It didn't feel right to cry then. He told me it had to be me. That I was his first choice cunt and he needed to fuck me. Nobody else, just then. Just me. I realized then that it had been a very long time since I had felt like a first choice for fucking.
It had been years.
I had gotten used to the idea that I was the easily available hole he could fuck at any time, but he was often imagining I was someone else. Someone in porn, or another woman from his past or present. It is a constant refrain in humiliation that he does, and somewhere along the line I had accepted it as fact, as a reality that I had to get used to, and not just a technique that he was using to get us both worked up. It was a painful realization that I was thinking this way.
He was sound asleep, so I waited until morning to tell him about these things. I lay awake for what seemed to be hours thinking these revelation thoughts. In the morning, still in the tent, we talked about what to do going forward, because I LIKE humiliation. It works for me, I mean really works. It is SO hot. But taking humiliation play for reality is evidently not something that I want. It is certainly not something he wants me to feel, because he says I AM his first choice lover. His first choice cunt. So, we will be finding our way slowly forward on that.
I still have a lot more of Saturday to write about. However, if anyone writes about Master's scene it will be him.
Last night Master attached the clover clamps to my lower lips and stretched them tight. He inserted two fingers and began fucking me with t...
Last night I didn't think he was going to want anything before bed. Thursday night (actually 1:30 am Friday morning) we'd had sex. ...
Kneeling is a position that represents submission or deference in many cultures and places across the world. Being literally higher as repr...
We went to a Thai noodle shop for lunch yesterday and were just talking about this and that. I said, "I don't think people change...