I was thinking about a statement someone made. Paraphrased, it was "One can force a slave to do something, but they can't make the slave like it."
Does this hold true for you, or are there times when you have been convinced/conditioned/other wise had your mind
changed about an activity or situation?
How did this occur?
Was it a deliberate plan that both knew about? Was it a plan that the slave did not know about?
Did it just happen through adaptation/becoming more alike in tastes?
Does it go the other way, that you can change your Master's mind?
Here, he has a mix of purposeful conditioning by him, and adaption
by myself, in wanting to please and wanting to be on his page. There
are many things that I started out not liking, or fearing without having
tried them, that I end up liking. I could probably take up way too
much space with listing them. I also like to do things for him that I
don't actually like, but often that eventually evolves into a love of
the task/activity as well, over time and seeing him pleased with me many
times.
He doesn't discuss any of these plans with me, so I don't know when
they are coming, but sometimes I can see them as they are happening- as
in "Hey, I used to hate that but now it's ok. Oh damn, now I really
want it."
One example for me was a couple of years ago, actually. He wanted me to give him a blow job while he watched porn. I was new to the whole slaving thing, and objectification had not been a big part of our relationship before then. I tried, but eventually became so upset and emotional during the act, and reacting to being used and objectified that way that I broke down, cried, and asked him not to do that anymore.
He kind of shook me up and told me he'd use me the way he wanted to because I was his property. (Eeee hot, BTW). So I obeyed and kept at it. The fact that he was ordering me to do it for his pleasure, regardless of how I felt, was a very powerful thing for me.
Now, it is a regular feature of our life, and I and enjoy it, especially in the sense than it objectifies me to the status of just a mouth for his pleasure. He doesn't even look at me. I revel in the objectification. I get wet from it.
That was one way he took something that was a negative experience for me and turned it into a positive one.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
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