Sunday, April 7, 2013


I have conflicted and confused feelings about funishment.   The internet gurus seem to say that it is a silly and worthless concept.   Either there should be beatings "just because he/she feels like it", or for mutual pleasure, or there should be real punishment that no one enjoys.

My conflicted and confused feelings come in because my Master sometimes says he feels guilty beating me really hard for no particular reason (although he likes to do it or he wouldn't bother), which leads him to sometimes make up a reason, like "I'm sure you were thinking naughty thoughts today" or "You were holding hands and kissing Myst- you tramp!"  or "You got your necklace tangled in your hair, bad girl."    I try really hard not to take any of this personally, because I know he is just making up reasons for having a fun time, but depending on how seriously and convincingly he says it I may feel bad anyway, because I really, really hate to be in trouble.  And I guess I'm a bit gullible that way.  I want to be good, and give him no reasons to punish me.  

Although I enjoy the sensation and lovely after effects of a good beating, and I enjoy him having power over me that way, I do not enjoy feeling like I did something wrong to deserve it.  Now I'm wondering if this is just a slightly different version of sadistic joy for him, the emotional sadism part.



  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  2. The gurus are wrong. I have lots of experience as a top and bottom with more than 25 play partners. 95% of my play is funishment. I do not need a reason to spank someone hard. And, the tops who spank me do not need a reason to beat my butt until it is cherry red.

    Most of the reasons for a spanking are ridiculous, but who cares as long as the result is a spanking.



Morning Hotness

I had just showered this morning when Master came upstairs "to nap" and found me getting dressed.  He told me to put on some u...