Writing

Every time I try to write something, I sit here staring at a blank blogger page.  For three days now. 

It is not that we haven't been doing things.  Perhaps I'm just overwhelmed by all the things, and this cold in my head isn't allowing me to think straight enough to write.  

Anyway, Master made some porn videos of me and had me post one on Fet.  I was getting caned while tied to the rafters in our bedroom.  It was just a short clip, but I was stomach churningly nervous about it being posted.   I worried that I wasn't attractive and that people would see it and think bad things about the way I look, the way the fat jiggles, erk.

 Master chided me for thinking this way, as HE finds me attractive and that is the most important thing of course.   At the same time, watching the video brings back all the memories of how hot that night was and how much I enjoyed it.  I worried that people would watch it.  I worried that people wouldn't watch it (gah, attention whore tendencies!).  Mostly I just worried.  It was the same way when I first posted still naked pictures on the internet.  Sigh.  Much worry over nothing, really.

Thursday night started with punishment because Wednesday I had done a few things wrong (being disobedient) and royally pissed off Master, who already had a headache, so he was mad enough that he wouldn't punish me.  He waited until he had a cool attitude the next day and then punished me. 

When that was over, the "fun caning" was on, and that was when he took the videos.