Sunday, March 9, 2014

Safeword? Nope.

Our relationship with safewords has long been somewhat complicated.  He doesn't follow either of the established BDSM "laws" or "true ways" on safewords.  On one hand, some people state that you must have one which is honored 100% or you are just with a dangerous abuser.  

Or, on the other side, others say either that safewords are entirely useless (just communicate!) or a slave should never have one because it takes away the Master's absolute power.  

My Master has his own way.  I can have a safeword until he says I can't.  Because property.  

Last night Master began flogging me, and I don't know if my tolerance was especially light for some reason, he was especially strong with it, or I'm just out of practice in being flogged, but it was really stinging.  He used the wood paddle on me then and damn it, that really hurt.  I was trying to shrink out of the way, though I didn't mean to; my body kept try to sag and squirm and avoid it.

He stopped and gripped me by the throat.  

"Are you trying to avoid the beating you wanted?"

"Yes, Master", I said sheepishly, not trying to explain.

"Well, tonight your safeword won't work.  The paddle is going to beat you as much as it wants, and 'red' is not going to stop it."

I went all squishy at the thought.

He went on "Try it, say red now". 

He smacked me again really hard with the paddle. 


Smack! Smack! Smack!  

Nope.  Doesn't work.  

I buoyed myself up with the thought that I can take this.  I can take it and eventually will reach subspace and I will enjoy it.

When I started to get shaky on my feet he told me to lie down on the floor face down.  My wrists were tied.   

He caned me, paddled me and used the single tail whip on me until I was deep in space.  My butt, my thighs, my calves, the soles of my feet.  Turn over.  My cunt ("SPREAD!"), inner thighs, my breasts (oh, I tried to hide them but that didn't work).  Turn over again.  My butt, my thighs, and so on, and on. 

  Then he propped me up on my hands and knees and fucked me hard.  It was So. Damn. Good.   I was moaning and bucking and coming, my sore ass being pounded over and over by his hips. 

He had me get in bed and ride on top of him, using the vibrator to make me come over and over.  Each time he made me wait until he commanded it.  It is so hard to wait right on the verge of orgasm.  He pinched and flicked my nipples until I could barely stand it, which just made me want to come more.  I soaked the towel I had been allowed to lay underneath him.  

When he was done with me and rolled me off to lie next to him, I was an unresponsive blob of nothingness.  I pretty much passed out straight away.   

God, what a great night!  


  1. Sounds like a wonderful night in the end! Did it cause you anxiety and fear to not have your safe word or is the trust strong enough that you weren't worried?

    1. It did cause a moment of fear and anxiety, and that was why the "buoying up" was necessary. But even when it is ok to use it I rarely have.

  2. Sounds like it was a great night. How long did it take for you to return from subspace?


    1. I don't really know- I fell asleep and when I woke up it was morning and I was back to normal. At other times, when I didn't get to fall asleep, it has lasted anywhere from minutes to hours, and it is really hard for me to tell where it begins and ends because my brain is functioning weirdly, so telling things about myself becomes tricky.

  3. Wow. Terrific night. It had to be incredibly intense for you and scary.


  4. Hot!

    We don't have a safeword, and not out of any principles one way or the other. But since I'm incapable of using it, it would be more dangerous to have one. If someone playing with me things it's okay to go on until I use a safeword, it might not end so great...

  5. Great read! I love intense lay.

    We do have a safeword, but then we have only been together for little over six months, so I think it is best for both of us for now. I know Mr Hyde does worry about hurting me, and with my abusive past he is doing it to protect me. That I am as tough as a brick doesn't matter. I have played without a safeword before, but then I knew that they were never even going to go near my limits, let alone push them. So that was kind of redundant.


Tuesday Slutday

Tuesday was a delightful day.  We had a lunch date which I thought was going to be just lunch, but then it turned into caned and being a wel...